


Oceanus

by Biorenewologist



Series: Throughout the Realms [1]
Category: Pocket God, Pocket God Comics
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Fixing everything this comic ever did wrong one gay step at a time, Multi, Nonbinary Character, Nonbinary Newbie, Nonbinary Nooby, Not canon past issue 4, Ooga is arrested for sass pollution, Rewriting The Whole Goddamn Thing, Santa is a bigfoot knockoff and also kind of a dick, Sun will kick her own ass, Temporary Character Death, epic bromances, everyone is pan or ace, integrating comic and game lore, salty boyfriends: the fanfic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-19
Updated: 2016-08-22
Packaged: 2018-05-27 15:11:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 24,596
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6289504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Biorenewologist/pseuds/Biorenewologist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ooga was more than ready to put the whole 'gem started losing power and the whole tribe nearly died' thing behind him, but not everyone agreed with him. Klik is still bitter about not getting to see the gods himself, even though the gods were actually just a bunch of jerks called totems who can't agree on anything. He's starting to see weird stuff that no one else can. And on top of it all, an awful lot of outside forces seem to be taking a sudden interest in their tribe, and he has no idea what to do about it.</p>
<p>They could at least have the decency to leave him alone while he's fishing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Undisturbed

**Author's Note:**

> AU where instead of those weird colour ball things, we just got the totems from the very beginning, because that makes way more sense. Also, people do less dumb stuff, and everyone is queer. 
> 
> I swear I was just going to continue from Issue 26 and finish things myself. I swear that was the plan. I just kinda...... got really mad. And now the gays are everywhere.
> 
> So yeah, I'm just gonna rewrite the whole thing. New plotline, new endgame, all sorts of new stuff. We'll see how far I get.

If asked why he was partial to being near the ocean, Ooga would say it was because he was hassled less by the living definition of a headache there.

The atmosphere of relief and camaraderie had taken all of three days to dissolve. Those were three pretty sweet days, he had to admit - everyone went out of their way to talk to him, or look at him like he's in on their inside jokes rather than being the butt of them, or just generally acknowledge his existence and contributions to the tribe. Three solid days of friendly people, because the whole _bargaining with the gods and saving everyone's lives_ thing was fresh in their minds.

By the end of the third day, everyone had remembered that he was annoying, nothing but trouble, and kind of a jerk, and everything had basically gone back to normal. He was fine with that. Three days was more than he had expected to get, and maybe it was his imagination, but the others seemed just a little more tolerant of his antics or cared just a little more about his opinions. All in all, pretty good.

Except for Klik.

If asked again by someone else, Ooga would be more prepared, and he'd joke that not even the ocean was as salty as Klik. He'd give himself a pat on the back for that one. That was funny enough that it would be worth saying right to his face, just to see the expression he got.

Klik had stopped being grateful by around day two, but he had still tried to be friendly for that third day. That hadn't worked out. The guy inevitably got on Ooga's nerves, and that made him snark, which got on _Klik's_ nerves, and everything went downhill very fast from there. They went from rebellious and exasperated to mutually frustrated in a matter of hours, and that was the end of the friendly atmosphere.

Ooga sighed, pulling the line back in. Nothing on the line, but that was alright; he'd probably already gotten all the fish he could out of that particular area. If he was being honest, he already had all the fish he needed. He could have stopped a long while ago. But hey, everyone knew that it took more than that to make him give up, especially when giving up wouldn't burn another fifteen minutes and give him an excuse to not be around the others.

_I can't stop ignoring my problems now. I'm on a roll here._

Impossibly enough, Klik seemed to be even more annoyed and annoying than usual. It didn't take a genius to figure out that he was touchy about not getting to meet the gods himself. Ooga had informed him that the gods - or _totems,_ they had called themselves - were a bunch of dicks, so he hadn't really been missing out on much. Klik had not appreciated the reassurance. 

He got it, really. Klik had put in way more time and effort into serving the gods than anyone else; he was allowed to be jealous when the neighbourhood slacker got to talk to them directly. Hell, Ooga would probably feel a little guilty if he wasn't being such a pain in the ass all the time. As it was, he was going on hour five of fishing, making a total of three unnecessary hours dedicated totally to stalling the inevitable return to camp and constant nagging.

"The fish are less salty than Klik," Ooga muttered, tugging a clump of seaweed off the line. "Yeah, that's much better delivery. Should go with that one. Maybe wink a bit."

Drawing back the fishing pole, Ooga flicked his wrist and sent the line flying back out with practiced ease. Fishing was a weird experience. It took almost no effort or attention, but somehow it still held all his focus, and he was _good_ at it. He could do it for hours without getting bored or tired. Assigned chores were murder on the brain, even for just fifteen minutes - too repetitive, too menial, too boring and easy to lose focus on - but tell him to fish for two hours straight, and he'd bring back results. _Edible_ results.

He wasn't sure how to explain that to people, though, so he usually just said that it came naturally. They accepted it easily enough.

Movement caught his eye, and Ooga pulled himself back to the present, returning his focus to the water. Fishing was reflexive by now, but even he could lose a catch if he was too zoned out. He glanced down to scan for shadows, only to halt and stare. That wasn't a fish poking at his line, not by a long shot.

Something blue and wispy was poking out of the water.

Frowning, Ooga leaned forward, trying to get a better look. Whatever it was, it looked translucent, almost ethereal. It sent a shudder down his spine, and it took a moment to realize why: when it moved, it didn't make any ripples in the water.

_What is that?_

It moved, and Ooga found himself looking at a fish. A blue, glowy, see-through fish. He stared, and it stared back, fins waving and eyes unblinking.

"Uh," Ooga said. "Hi?"

Not his smoothest moment, but if he was totally honest, ghosts were a bit too far out of his comfort zone. Either things came back or they stayed dead. He did not like thinking about any inbetweens. 

The ethereal fish didn't respond. He wasn't sure what he expected. Last time he checked, living fish didn't give a shit about what he had to say. Why would weird ghost fish be any different?

"So, um," Ooga said. "No hard feelings about the whole 'catching you for food' thing, right? It wasn't personal or anything."

This would not be a good way to die. He wasn't sure how he was going to explain 'a ghost fish came to get revenge on me' to the others. 

Maybe the ghost fish appreciated that, because with a flick of its long, flowing tail, it was gone without a trace. There wasn't even a ripple to prove it had been there at all.

Ooga was left staring down at the water, wondering if he should take that as a warning and stop fishing for the day.

-:-:-

He wasn't sure what he had been expecting when he fell down that hole, but rows of strange, ethereal figures looking down at him was definitely not it. Whatever was going on, it was better than zombies, he decided. He ogled them from flat on his back, and they stared back, some with a lot more eyes than others.

"Uh," Ooga said. "Hey. Is this a bad time?"

**Hello, Ooga,** said someone from up in the cavern. **Took you long enough to get here. We've been waiting around all day.**

Great. He was late to the party, and he hadn't even known he was invited.

"Are you… gods?" Ooga asked, staring up at the countless figures. 

**Of a sort,** said one of the gods, sounding amused. Ooga glanced around to see who was talking and immediately regretted it when he was confronted with a massive, hideous ant. **We are totems, higher beings in this world. You and your people call us gods.**

Face to face with real gods - or totems. Whatever. He was definitely in over his head here. Where was Klik when you needed him for once?

Oh, right. He was dead. Ha ha ha.

"This stopped being funny a long time ago," Ooga muttered, getting to his feet.

**Indeed, this is a serious matter,** said a weird humanoid. It looked like it was made of mottled stone, and it held a leather-bound book in its hands. **Your tribe is very nearly dead. You are the only spark of life left in your gemstone, and should that go out, it would be impossible even for us to restore it.**

"But you can do it?" Ooga saw the opening and seized it, stepping forward. "You can fix this? You can bring everyone back?"

**Can, yes,** rumbled a massive voice, and Ooga turned to see a dinosaur of all things glowering at him. **It is well within our abilities.**

"Then what the hell are you waiting for?" Ooga said, but cringed at the glares he got. "Er… please?"

The dinosaur snorted air out of its nostrils, turning its head to stare him right in the eye. **Just because we can does not mean we will. Especially not when you are doing the asking, little meal.**

Uh oh. Looked like everyone he knew wasn't the extent of the people who didn't like him after all. This would take drastic measures.

"Please," Ooga repeated, trying to put more sincerity into his voice. He really was sincere, but it was hard to show it when every other word that came out of his mouth was sarcastic. "If you can undo all this, then… please, I'll do whatever you want me to do, just bring them back."

If his past self could see him, they would be disgusted that he was begging the gods to save him, but his past self could go suck an egg. This was not the time for pride. This was the time to grovel before some higher powers and get his friends back.

"Bring them back," Ooga said, more desperately. His hands were shaking, and he clenched his fingers, his grip tight around the gemstone. "They - they didn't deserve to die. If you have to kill me, then fine, but bring them back."

**They died, fair and square,** hissed one of the gods. He couldn't see it clearly, but he could swear its skin was rotting and falling off in places. **If no Realm claims them, their souls belong to Infernus, and to me.**

**A dead mortal is no use to us,** objected another. Ooga looked over and saw the long, winding form of a dragon raise its head. **There are precious few of their sort left. We cannot waste them.**

**Waste?** demanded the first, indignant. **You wouldn't say that if they were going to Aeris! You'd keep their souls for yourself!**

**You're no better, Manent,** said a third - a monkey, by the looks of it. It chittered and flapped its hands at the rotting god. **You would protest if any other Realm tried to take them all for itself.**

**I'm sorry, Simia, did I look like I asked for your input?**

The monkey screeched, slapping the ground, and a murmur of anger went around the gathered gods. They glared and hissed at one another, watching warily for any signs of violence or further disrespect.

"Hey!" Ooga shouted, forgetting that he was trying to seem polite. "Can you stop talking shit about each other and bring my tribe back already? Seriously!"

**How rude,** grumbled a strange humanoid that seemed to be holding a hammer.

**The mortal is right,** thundered one of the three tallest gods, the red one with horns. **Get ahold of yourselves and focus on the task at hand!**

The room quieted, though the monkey still made a rude gesture at the rotting god.

**Better,** said the horned god. **All present, confer according to your Realm. We will reconvene for the vote when all is ready.**

"The vote?" Ooga asked. "What vote? What are you voting on?"

**It is none of your concern,** said the horned god, almost kindly. **Do not fret over it, little mortal. Our dealings will be just.**

**If you wish to speak of things that are not your concern, Ardebit, then meddle with mortals of your own Realm,** said the thing beside it. Ooga wasn't really sure what it was, to be honest - it was cloaked in shadow, dripping with the ink of immeasurably deep water. He wondered if he was imagining the writhing tendrils and dripping mandibles behind the dark. **Souls of Oceanus are my domain, not yours.**

Ardebit - was that the horned god's name? - glowered, but did not argue. It turned away and vanished like it had never been, and the other gods followed, one by one.

"What vote?" Ooga repeated, raising his voice. "Hey! Tell me what's happening!"

**The totems present are gathering to discuss your case,** said the eldritch ink thing, who seemed in no hurry to leave. **Each Realm will cast a vote to determine the fate of your tribe.**

"You're voting on whether you should bring them back or not?" Ooga asked.

**Don't be so naive, little fish,** chided the eldritch thing. **We have already decided to interfere. And now that we have, we must decide if we wish to restore your tribe to life, or to kill you and destroy it completely.**

-:-:-

"Best friend Ooga?" 

Ooga groaned, flopping over in bed. He wasn't sure what time it was, but his internal clock was saying it was approximately Go-The-Hell-Back-To-Sleep in the morning. "Go 'way, I'm asleep."

"Nooby heard a scary noise," said the person that had dared wake him up. He swore an eternal grudge against them. "Is from outside hut."

Oh, it was just Nooby. Ooga revoked his eternal grudge in favour of temporary irritation. "Go back to sleep, Nooby," he muttered. "Just ignore it."

"But Nooby has to tinkle and scary noise is outside!" Nooby grabbed his hand, and Ooga opened his eyes to see him staring down at him pleadingly. "Ooga come with Nooby just in case?"

Ooga groaned again, rolling over and burying his head in the leaf-stuffed pillow. "It was probably just the wind. Don't worry about it."

"Nooby never heard wind make sound like that…"

"Look, whatever it is, the worst it can do is kill you," Ooga said. "You'll be _fine._ Now let me sleep, will you?"

"Okay," Nooby said, though he still sounded dubious. "Goodnight, best friend Ooga."

"Night," Ooga mumbled, already half-asleep again. 

He heard the pitter-patter of tiny feet leaving the hut, and then nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The truth is apparent: you never really escape the Pocket God fandom.
> 
> If you're wondering what the deal is with all these totems, rest assured that I'm not just pulling them out of my ass. Every single goddamn one corresponds to an idol in the original game, and because of Nox, every single goddamn one also has a Latin name full of ~symbolism~ and shit. If you're looking for answers about these guys, great! The game has all the lore you need. 
> 
> We only have like 6 people and a goat, so every time you comment, I get approval from a solid eigth of the fandom. That's kind of amazing, and kind of sad. Believe me when I say your opinion matters.
> 
> That said: I'm back, assholes, and so is my fanfic for this garbage fandom. You're welcome, and I am so sorry. (I'm still doing it though.)


	2. Saltwater

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ooga talks to a fish, Klik reduces his salt content, Ardebit is surrounded by children who were accidentally handed godly power, and Nooby discusses the finer points of soul duplication with a mostly naked version of Santa. Not in that order.

The totems were back in the circle, chattering to each other in thunderous voices, or squabbling over whatever gods squabbled about. Probably infinite power or something. Ooga looked back and forth, staring and taking them all in. There were some that looked normal, or at least familiar - things like the monkey, or the bird, or even the massive dinosaur. Others seemed abstract, but still made a sort of sense, like the weird humanoid things holding stuff - one had a globe, another had a book, another didn't have anything but was balancing on its head. A few were just downright weird or horrifying, like the one that looked like a rotting corpse, or the massive spider that kept looking at him like it wanted to take a chunk out of his arm.

And then there were the three that were sitting in massive chairs. Ooga wondered if they were in charge of this show. They looked pretty important up there, and they certainly sat like they knew it. The demon-looking horned god they called Ardebit sat in the middle, patiently waiting for everyone to arrive; to their left sat a large, stern-looking person with a wispy, cloudlike beard. By the way lightning kept flickering around their tapping fingers, they were probably some sort of storm god. There was another seat to their right, but it was empty.

Above those three seats were two more, but they were covered in dust and vines were starting to grow in the cracks. It didn't look like anyone had sat there for a long time.

The inky thing from before slipped back into the room. He wasn't sure how it was moving - it definitely didn't have feet - but whatever it was doing, it almost looked like it was doing it leisurely. 

**Fashionably late, I see,** Ardebit said dryly.

 **Time matters less in the pitch-dark depths of the ocean,** said the inky thing, settling into the seat to their right. **Is everyone present, then?**

 **We are now,** grumbled the storm god.

Ardebit slammed a hand against the arm of their chair with an enormous _CRACK,_ and the cavern fell silent. Ooga clutched the Gem of Life tighter, shrinking in on himself.

 **The totems have gathered to vote on a matter of life and death,** Ardebit said, their voice ringing through the cavern. **The fate of the mortal tribe rests on the majority vote. We decide now whether to destroy this tribe and distribute their souls according to their affinity, with all unclaimed souls going to Infernus, or to restore its immortality and return all of its members to life.**

Ooga didn't dare say anything.

 **Each Realm has made their decision amongst themselves,** Ardebit said. **There is only the vote remaining. We will have the standing representatives of each Realm cast their vote, one by one. The process begins now.**

_What do I do if they vote to destroy us?_

**Fulgur,** Ardebit said. **What agreement has the Realm of Aeris come to?**

The storm god stood, and a murmur of approval went around the ring. Some of the ring, Ooga corrected himself. The monkey looked happy, and so did a handful of others, but some looked more sour. A lot of the creepier ones did not look happy to see the storm god whatsoever.

 **The Realm of Aeris votes to restore the mortal tribe,** said Fulgur. **We will not see them in the chains of Infernus.**

 **I expect nothing less of a realm of cowards,** said the rotting god in a loud whisper. **You never take decisive action!**

 **Pick and choose your battles, jerk,** said the monkey god, chittering angrily. 

Ardebit slammed a fist on the chair again, and the cavern quieted. **Rapax,** they said. **How does Animus vote?**

The dinosaur tossed its head, stepping forward proudly. **The conquest of the tribe was fair! The Realm of Animus votes to keep them dead, and destroy this last one besides!**

"Yeesh," Ooga muttered.

 **Tumidus,** said Ardebit.

A massive, bloated creature, easily four times the size of any other, raised their head. No one dared look disapproving of that one. **The Realm of Pax votes to restore the mortal tribe,** said the bloated god. **It would be a shame to lose that much complexity in one fell swoop.**

Ardebit nodded. **Cavae, your vote?**

No one stepped forward, but the writhing, ink-covered mass on one of the thrones straightened a little. **The Realm of Oceanus,** said Cavae, **votes to destroy the mortal tribe, but to keep this last one alive.**

An angry murmur went around the cavern, this time from almost everyone. **Cheat!** howled the monkey above the rest. **You want the last mortal all to yourself, you cheat!**

Ardebit slammed the chair again, and everyone went quiet. **You always did have a flair for the dramatic,** they said dryly. 

**What does Infernus vote, Ardebit?** asked Cavae, apparently unconcerned by all of this. **You tip the scales one way or the other. Choose wisely.**

Ardebit chuckled, standing up. For a moment, they looked right at him, and Ooga quickly looked away. Looking a demon in the eye was never a good idea in his books. 

**So it comes to this,** Ardebit mused. 

Not a single totem spoke. They listened intently, watching the demon carefully. Ooga held his breath.

Ardebit smiled.

 **The Realm of Infernus votes to fully restore the mortal tribe, and send them safely home,** they said. **That is all.**

-:-:-

Apparently, when the world was on a roll, it didn't need three day breaks. All it needed was a good night's rest to start messing up his life again.

Normally he liked to start the day off right: spending an hour or so rigging up a deadly game, and then playing it with Nooby. That was always a good time. Klik didn't like it, but if he never did anything Klik didn't like, he literally wouldn't exist.

Haha, yeah, because Klik didn't like him. Good one. He'd have to write that one down. Not where anyone would ever read it, though, because it would probably just look depressing. Jokes weren't supposed to be depressing.

They somehow always ended up more depressing when they were true.

 _Anyways,_ Nooby had been a no-show. He must have wandered off. That was all well and good, but now Ooga was bored, and it wasn't even noon yet. Just great.

With nothing better to do, Ooga had decided to get a head start on fishing. Nooby would be able to find him pretty easily when he got back, and doing nothing was not his forte. He needed _something_ to occupy his thoughts or he would lose it for sure. And seeing as there was pretty much nothing else to do on the island - nothing that wouldn't get him yelled at, at least - it was fishing or bust.

Yesterday's _incident_ had nothing to do with that decision.

"Oh, yeah, I totally saw a ghost fish the other day," Ooga said in a mocking voice, waving a hand in the air. "Them's the breaks, Klik. Without something to do I will crack and start hallucinating. You're gonna have to bust the ghost or _let me do my thing,_ because nobody else is going to catch enough food around here!"

Stupid ghost fish. Stupid Klik. Stupid totems making his tribemate hate him more than usual, and forcing him to deal with supernatural crap himself.

"Stupid me, going down to the exact same spot I saw the ghost fish," Ooga muttered. "Do I have a death wish or what?"

Normally a death wish wouldn't matter, but who knew when it came to ghosts? Maybe they could un-kill people. Or un-resurrect them. Or… something. This was not his area of expertise, which is why it would be great if Klik could _stop being a shithead_ and _do his damn job_ again-

A tiny tug on the line pulled him back to the present, and Ooga's eyes flashed down to the water. Now this was his area - he could handle this.

Careful. Couldn't scare it away. One little, experimental tug, twitching the bait enticingly and pulling it a little closer. That should prompt the fish to move, and he'd spot the shadow. Then-

Nothing on the line. Instead, there was a flash of light from beneath the water.

_Huh?_

A translucent blue face poked out, and Ooga found himself staring at the ghostly fish again. 

"Oh, it's you," Ooga said, eyeing the fish. "Do you want something or what?"

No response. The fish just stared at him.

"What, I don't even get a hello?"

 **Hello,** said the fish.

Ooga shrieked and stumbled back, tripping over a piece of driftwood and landing flat on his ass. Definitely not smooth. That moment would be going on his top ten list of things he would never admit to doing, ever. Lucky for him, no one else was around to see it, or the _actual pants-shittingly real talking ghost-fish in front of him._

 **I'm not really familiar with mortal introduction customs, but I'm fairly sure that's not a normal part of them,** said the fish. **If only because it would mean getting an awful lot of sand in your pants.**

"You _talk?"_ Ooga hissed. He didn't trust himself to raise his voice above that level.

 **Evidently,** said the fish.

Great. A talking ghost-fish with a side serving of sarcasm. If this wasn't karma, he would ritualistically shove a stick so far up his ass that he'd be reincarnated as Klik.

 **So you really can see me now,** mused the fish, flicking its fins. **Interesting. I didn't think you had it in you, little fisher.**

"What do you mean, now? How long have you been watching me?"

 **As long as you have been fishing,** said the fish. **I'd say we know each other very well, after all these years of working together.**

Ooga frowned, rubbing his sore tailbone. "That's a pretty long time. What are you, some sort of fish god?"

 **In a sense, yes,** said the fish. **My name is Natare. I am a totem, a higher being of this world. You and your people call us gods.**

_Totems._

"You're one of the things I met in the volcano?" Ooga asked.

**I was not one of them, but yes. We are of the same kind.**

Well, fish gods were better than ghosts. Ooga sat forward, glancing briefly at the fishing pole. "Why are you talking to me now? Are you pissed off because I caught too many fish or something?"

 **Certainly not.** Natare sounded almost amused. **So long as you respect what you catch and you live in harmony with my ecosystem, I will give you whatever you need to support your tribe. That is the way it has always been.**

"Good to know. What's the deal, then? Why are you talking to me?"

 **You recently gained the ability to see and communicate with me,** Natare said. **I am interested in this. All of this is… new.**

Ooga frowned. "Why can I see you all of a sudden?"

**I do not know. That is why I am interested.**

"Alright, well… can you tell me about totems? What are you guys?"

Natare blew a bubble, and Ooga realized with a start that their fins were making ripples this time. **The simplest term for us is 'complexity'. We represent various forms of complexity in this world, and our numbers grow as the world does.**

"So you guys aren't like the gods," Ooga said, frowning. "Klik said you guys were eternal beings, but if another one could be born tomorrow…"

**Correct. We are powerful, but we are not gods in that sense. We are like reflections of the world, projected into the ethereal realm around it.**

Well, that wasn't worldview-shattering at all. Ooga shrugged it off, focusing back on the fish before him. "So how did all of you guys happen?"

 **When the world was young, there were only three of us,** Natare said. **The totems of fire, water, and air. We called these the Elemental Forces. They are very old and very powerful, and they demand absolute respect. If you have the misfortune of meeting one, I recommend that you demonstrate absolute submission or flee.**

"I'll try not to run into them," Ooga said.

 **The rest of us developed over time,** Natare said. **The next oldest among us is Tumidus, the current ruler of Pax, and then the three rulers of the Elemental Realms. I believe you would have seen them in the volcano.**

"You mean the guys on the thrones?"

 **That would be them,** Natare agreed. **We are both creatures of Oceanus, so Cavae is the head of our Realm. I hope you treated them respectfully.**

Ooga thought of the eldritch thing and their apparent nonchalance towards everything. "Well, I don't think they hate me, so I guess that's something."

 **Now, it is my turn to ask questions,** Natare said. **Where do you take my fish after you have killed them?**

"Uh, I bring them back to camp, and Klik decides whether we eat them or use them as sacrifices," Ooga said, frowning. "That's kind of a mundane question, isn't it? Can't you use your godly powers to find out?"

 **I have tried,** Natare said with a bubbly sigh. **I can see out of the eyes of my lesser kin, and direct them, but I can do nothing after they are dead. The dead are the domain of Infernus, after all.**

"You seem awfully limited for a fish god."

 **Do not think of me as a god,** Natare said. **Think of me as the supreme lord of the fish. That will put my abilities into perspective.**

Part of Ooga wanted to say that was dumb, but another pretty sizeable bit was a upset that he had missed his chance to call himself the supreme lord of the fish before Natare claimed the title.

 **What is it like, having legs?** Natare asked. **They look uncomfortable.**

"Legs?" Ooga glanced down at his legs. "They're good for walking, I guess."

 **But they barely bend at all,** Natare said. **And you'll never be able to feel them waving gently in the waves, like fins. Isn't that sad?**

"Fins don't work very well on land, buddy," Ooga said.

**And legs don't work very well on water. Last time I checked, there was much more water than land. It should be clear who's better off.**

…He wasn't sure he could argue with that.

"Maybe you're right," Ooga said. "This island is covered in jerks, anyways. If I'm part Oceanus or whatever, does that mean I can grow fins and leave forever?"

 **I doubt you can grow fins,** Natare said. **But if you really wanted to leave forever, all you need is a boat.**

"It's not that easy," Ooga said.

**Why not?**

_Because I can't just go off on my own,_ he was about to say, but he stopped. Going off on his own was… actually sort of possible, so long as he had a decent rod and enough water. It wouldn't be great - gods knew he would be screwed if he had to build or fix something - but it was _possible._

 _Because I can't leave the tribe,_ was his next thought. These people were his family. He would miss them if he left, and they would miss him. Probably.

Except everyone seemed to hate him, and they all got on his nerves, too. He was more independent than anyone in the tribe. It was clear they didn't _really_ want him around, and he could picture himself living without all of them, with Nooby being an exception to both. Maybe he really didn't belong there.

 _Because this is my home,_ he wanted to say. But…

Well, was it?

"Because I'd regenerate back as soon as I died," Ooga said, shrugging. "Besides, we don't even have a boat anymore."

 **I see,** Natare said. **It's a shame you don't have fins.**

He was inclined to agree, and that frightened him a little.

"Well, this has been fun," Ooga said, standing and dusting himself off. "But I need to go find Nooby. We've got games to play and an afternoon to spend."

 **Nooby,** repeated Natare. **Is that the one with the cracked hairbone?**

"Yeah, that's him."

 **I see,** Natare said. **He is not on your island right now.**

A chill went down his spine. "What are you talking about? Of course he is. Where else would he be?"

 **A large stranger took him across the water,** Natare said. **To the east, I believe. Has he returned home yet?**

-:-:-

Nooby wasn't sure about a lot of things.

For one thing, he wasn't sure what had happened. One moment he had been heading to the outhouse, the next he was being grabbed by a massive stranger. He had passed out, and the next thing he knew, he was here.

For another, he wasn't sure where he was. The ground was freezing cold, colder than any wind or water Nooby had ever felt. It sure didn't feel like sand, and it didn't taste like sand, either. His feet were starting to hurt from standing on it. He'd never been here before, that was for sure. The stranger seemed to know his way around, though, and he had offered to give Nooby a tour.

And for a third, Nooby wasn't sure who this guy was. Apparently his name was Just Red, which was a strange name. Nooby had never met anyone named after a colour before. He seemed nice enough - very welcoming, pretty friendly, maybe even jovial - and though Nooby had been a little frightened at first, he was warming up to the guy.

Not warming up in many other ways, though.

"Just Red?" Nooby asked, glancing up from where he sat on the floor. "Nooby is cold. Just Red have something to help Nooby's little frozen toes-en?"

"Oh, of course, where are my manners?" Just Red clipped a couple more wires together and turned around with a smile on his face. "I'm very sorry, little one. I forget that most people get cold. I will get you something warmer as soon as I finish calibrating the duplication device."

Another thing Nooby wasn't sure about: what the massive, intimidating metal machine in the middle of the room would do. Something about it gave him a bad feeling.

"This here is my greatest achievement," Just Red said, turning the fond smile on the machine. "I'm something of a scientist, you see. Or perhaps a better word is inventor. I create, and I improve, and I always build higher!"

"Nooby knows inventor," Nooby said. "Is Klik. Just Red is like Klik?"

"Oh, what I have here is much more advanced than anything your little tribemates could possibly have," Just Red said. "But if you mean a curious, scientific mind, then yes. I am like Klik."

"Wow, Just Red must be very much smart!" 

"Thank you, little one. I try."

Just Red went back to fiddling with the device, turning dials and moving wires, and soon he was completely absorbed in it. Nooby knew that look. He was muttering aloud to himself as he worked, utterly concentrated on the task at hand - the sort of look Klik got when he was doing Important Work and wasn't supposed to be distracted.

But there was one more thing Nooby was confused about.

"What Just Red want with Nooby?" Nooby asked.

Just Red stopped.

"Please," he said. "Call me Red."

"Oh, okie. What Red want with Nooby?"

"Nooby…" Red turned around, his eyes glittering a little. "What do you know about the Realms?"

"Nooby know realms!" Nooby said proudly. That was an easy one! "Is very big plants."

"That's elms," Red corrected gently. "The Realms are the great divisions through all of complexity - no, through all of _reality itself._ Everything that exists, everything that is or has ever been, is nothing but an expression of the Realms in harmony or in discord. They wax and wane, but never gain any ground on one another."

"Ohh," Nooby said, nodding thoughtfully. "Nooby understand."

Nooby didn't understand.

"Now, far be it from me to curse the Realms - after all, I myself serve one!" Red said. "But I have to admit that they make my job _much_ harder sometimes. If I want to create something that was not there before, it is very, _very_ difficult if the world is all composed out of the same basic five elements. It is easy to make a plant out of another plant, or to change earth to fire and back, but something inherently filled with the essence of water will never change to something of air. The Realms can be a little touchy about… touching."

Silence.

"Until now, that is!" Red turned back to smile at Nooby. "Today, everything changes. This will be the day my experiment will succeed, I am sure of it!"

"What so special about today?" Nooby asked. "Is solstice?"

"No, little one. Today is the day I met you!"

Aw, Red thought he was special. That was sweet.

"You see, you are the first person I've met in two hundred years," Red said, smiling even wider. "I've tried this process on inanimate things, and on plants and animals, but it has never worked. The result cannot sustain itself without support from outside sources. No, for this to succeed, I need a fully sentient being - an independent soul."

"Nooby not sure if Nooby has a soul in deep end," Nooby said. "Nooby prefer to stay in shallow end, where Nooby is safe from sharks."

"The key to it all is that a mortal soul does not truly _belong_ to any Realm," Red said. "It may have an affinity, but it belongs first and foremost to itself. This is a truly unique property! Everything from the fish in the sea, to the lava far beneath us, to even the written word belongs to a Realm. But mortals, _those_ are something else. They are the wild cards of this world! And if you wish for your creation to forge its own destiny, you must draw on the power of something that can deny the will of the world itself!"

"Red says many oozy-doozy complicated things," Nooby said. "What all this have to do with Nooby?"

"Everything, my boy!" Red winked at him. "You will be my blueprint. And with your soul, we will make more than something out of nothing - we will make a person where before there was only life!"

-:-:-

When he had first asked, Klik had not been helpful.

"If you're trying to hunt him down for one of your 'games', you can leave me out of it," Klik said, somewhere between stern and resigned. "You could give him a break every once in a while, you know."

"That's not why I'm asking," Ooga said, fighting not to roll his eyes. Eye-rolling was in his nature, but it wouldn't help here. "I haven't seen Nooby all day and I'm worried. That's all."

"I'm sure he's fine. He probably just got stuck in the mudsink again."

"Just humour me!" Ooga snapped. "When was the last time you saw him? Did he regenerate at all today?"

Klik considered it, his brow furrowing as he thought. "…No, he hasn't."

"Right." Not that unusual. No reason to panic. "Well, you woke up first, right? Did you see him go out?"

Klik frowned, shaking his head slowly. "No. He didn't leave camp while I was there."

"But you were still there when I got up," Ooga objected. "And he was already gone by then. You must have missed him."

His frown deepened. "I don't think so. I saw everyone else get up."

_No…_

"Did you check to see if he was in the hut when you got up?" Ooga asked.

Klik said nothing, but the way his eyes widened was answer enough.

"He's been gone since yesterday," Ooga said, his heart sinking. "And he hasn't regenerated once."

Silence.

"I'll tell the others," Klik said, straightening. "You get a head start on the search. Look in any spot you can think of where he might go. We'll find him soon enough."

The tension in his stomach eased, and Ooga sighed, closing his eyes briefly. "Thanks."

"Thank me when we find him," Klik said, but he smiled a little as he said it.

For all the shit he gave him, Klik was a godsend in a crisis.

The island wasn't very big. Klik had organized the others with impressive speed and minimal complaining, dividing the work between them. Ooga, who knew Nooby best, would check any spots Nooby might have headed to. Booga, their best hunter and tracker, would do a sweep of the woods. Dooby would search the beach, running the whole perimeter. Klik had intended to stay in the camp, but Klak had suggested that he be the one to stay. Nooby might come back if he got hungry, and Klak knew how to fry a mean fish. 

With all jobs assigned, and with orders to meet back at the campsite when they were done their section or after forty five minutes, Ooga had taken off.

_Nooby's not on the island._

That couldn't be right. He had to be somewhere around here, goofing off or distracted. Maybe he had fallen asleep. He couldn't just be _gone._

…Probably.

Maybe.

He was having trouble keeping himself convinced of that. Half an hour of rushing around the island, checking every possible spot, tended to make dents in that sort of perspective. The more time he spent looking, the harder it was to keep the hope alive.

Not by the anthill. Not stuck in that one tree he always got stuck in. Not staring up at the sun on top of the hill again. Not rearranging that creepy corpse collection of his. Anywhere he checked, some likely and some less so, gave the same result.

Nothing. Nooby was nowhere to be found. He was gone.

"That's not possible," Ooga muttered, shaking his head. "We're all stuck here. There are no islands within swimming distance. We don't have a boat. I can't leave the island, and neither can he."

But Nooby wasn't here. How did he explain that?

 _A large stranger took him across the water,_ Natare had said. What did that even mean? Someone outside the tribe had taken him?

"It's a hell of a big jump," Ooga said aloud. People outside the tribe was a big assumption to start with. Klik said it was possible, and there were likely ancient civilizations out there, but living people? The odds were slim at best, given their immortality. Natare's word by itself wasn't really evidence…

_He heard a noise outside in the middle of the night._

Ooga swallowed, but the lump in his throat persisted. He might have been the last one to see Nooby after all. Nooby had even asked him to go with him, and-

_This is all my fault._

Nooby was gone. He had screwed up again, and it had cost the one person who actually cared about him. Typical.

_Great. Just great. I really do ruin everything, don't I?_

No time for that. Ooga took off through the trees, heading for the meeting spot. If this was his fault, he'd make it right with his own two hands. Whatever it took, he would get Nooby back, and then he would never let this happen again.

Even if it meant getting up in the middle of the night next time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the great reception! I have to revise my statement now. Because I got 9 kudos last chapter, we actually have at least *9* people and a goat in the fandom (including myself) or a bunch of nerds leaving sockpuppet kudos. Either way, I appreciate it!
> 
> Every comment I get pushes the inevitable character death back another chapter. It's been shown scientifically.


	3. Making waves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One plotline, two sides. Add a magic fish, gender confusion, and assorted interpersonal issues. Mix well.

Across the water, there was a flash of brilliant light, and force enough to bend metal rippled outwards, sending a shudder through the ice island and waves rushing away from it in all directions. The groaning of metal and ice under strain filled the air, creaking dangerously. Around the island, tiny creatures stirred, disturbed by the tremor and watching warily for predators, and eventually settled down again.

On the island, the shaking stopped. Someone exclaimed something, and another voice piped up a moment later. A hulking beast of ice glanced up, irritated, then went back to dozing. Three hearts beat steadily, and three souls glowed.

Beside the island, a perfectly normal fish watched all of this in silence, and then slipped under the water again.

-:-:-

It had occurred to him that maybe one of the others had found Nooby, and he was perfectly fine, and Ooga was panicking for no reason. That was a possibility - a very real possibility, even. There had been a brief flicker of hope somewhere in there. It wasn't like he had zero faith in the people around him. Just because _he_ hadn't found Nooby didn't mean someone else couldn't do it. He really had felt hope rekindle itself, honest.

Then he got back to the meeting spot, and after a brief pause to dash the totally real hopes, he went back to not having to pretend to trust people with anything important.

"There's no sign of him anywhere," Klik said, chewing anxiously on his bottom lip. "If Dooby doesn't find him on the beach, then…"

"He's not on the island," Ooga said. Even though he had already suspected, it still made his heart sink to hear Klik admit it.

_Natare was right._

"That might not be true," Klik said hastily. He was quick to try to make him feel better, even after everything they'd done to each other. This was why Ooga never knew how to feel about him. "I mean, Dooby's not back yet."

"That doesn't mean he'll have results."

"Dooby's the fastest," Klik reminded him. "He should have gotten back first. If he isn't back yet, then he must have found _something."_

True. That was another reason to appreciate Klik: he usually had a point. The guy was reliable, whether that meant sticking to the same routine every day or being at least partially right about almost everything. Everything except reasons to be mad at Ooga, of course. He somehow always managed to be completely wrong about that.

Klik squinted, peering at where Klak and Booga were. "I think Booga might be harassing Klak again."

"Is he?" Ooga shielded his eyes. "Yeah, probably. Don't know why he bothers, though. It's not like it'll be funny when his sense of humour is shit."

Klik gave him a look.

"Hey, I'm just saying," Ooga said, raising his hands in surrender.

"I should go break that up," Klik said. "Will you be alright on your own?"

"Of course I will." Ooga crossed his arms, giving him a look right back. "I don't need you to hold my hand, Klik. I can handle myself."

Klik sighed. "I know. Alright, just… don't get into trouble, and don't start any while I'm gone. We don't need this situation to get more complicated than it already is."

"Sure."

Ooga watched him go, musing over his conflicting emotions, then decided to just not pay attention to any of it. Klik was a weird guy who made no sense, and he didn't know how to feel about him. What else was new?

**Little fish!**

Ooga spun, alarmed, and nearly lost his footing in the sand. "What? Who's there?"

 **By the water, little fish. I should hope you know who I am by now.**

Oh, yeah. He knew who that was. _That_ was new.

"What are you doing?" Ooga hissed, glancing from side to side, then leaning forward to see Natare in the shallows. "Someone's going to see you!"

 **No one but you can see me,** Natare said. **We can talk without giving my presence away.**

"Okay, sure, but they can see me talking to myself, which is just as bad!" Ooga crossed his arms. "My reputation can only take so many hits, you know. This had better be important."

 **I have tracked down your missing friend,** Natare said.

"You what?" Ooga dropped to his knees, looking Natare right in the eye. "Where is he? Did someone really take him? Is he okay?"

 **I could not get close enough to see,** Natare said, almost apologetically. **But he is nearby. Half a day's journey by boat to the east, on an island made entirely of ice. The stranger who took him is there as well.**

He was starting to like this fish.

"Thanks," Ooga said, giving them a curt nod. "I'll point the others in the right direction."

**Wait, little fish. There are two things you need to know.**

"What?"

 **That island is under the control of another totem,** Natare said. **A very powerful, very territorial totem. I cannot exert my influence directly there. This journey to save your friend will be incredibly dangerous. Do you understand?**

"Got it," Ooga said.

**And you still intend to go?**

"Of course! I'm not just going to leave him there."

 **Oh, good,** Natare said. **I need you to do something for me.**

"Alright…? What is it?"

 **I need you to vanquish that totem,** Natare said. **Bring about its defeat, no matter the cost. This is an incredibly difficult task that only you and your tribe can do. If you do that, I will give you my assistance in any area I can.**

"Uh, alright," Ooga said. "Why can't we just avoid it?"

 **That totem has been giving me trouble for decades,** Natare explained. **I cannot engage them directly, but a mortal like you can do so as you please. If you vanquish that totem, I will have sovereignty over this entire area.**

"…You're trying to get me to fight another totem for you," Ooga said flatly. "So you can expand your territory. Seriously?"

 **Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realize this was such a small matter,** Natare said, bobbing back and forth in a manner that was definitely sarcastic. **Your mission to rescue someone who can regenerate back any time is _clearly_ a very important quest that I need to help you with. My mistake.**

Never mind. He was not starting to like this fish.

"Fine, whatever, I'll beat your stupid totem rival," Ooga said with a sigh. "Is that all?"

 **There is one other thing,** Natare said. **I do not know what it means, but… little fish, the one who took your friend is no laughing matter. They are a servant of Animus, and I know nothing of their motives. That is why what I saw troubles me greatly.**

"What you saw? I thought you couldn't see anything."

 **I saw a great light,** Natare said. **Before, there were only two souls on that island. But after that light, something terrible shook the island, and then there were three. Another soul, formed out of nothing. I have never heard of something like this.**

"That's weird," Ooga said, frowning.

**It is very weird. That is why I wish to warn you of this: beware the third soul. Whatever purpose it was made for, and whatever form it has taken, it is not good news for anyone.**

"Right," Ooga said. He stood and dusted himself off. "I'll try to tip the others off about it and keep an eye out for that third soul."

**Good. Now look alive, little fish. Your friend is coming back.**

Ooga looked over to see Klik still off in the distance, talking to Booga and Klak. "What are you talking about? He's still all the way over-"

"Dude!"

Ooga turned to see Dooby racing across the beach at full speed. He never watched where he was going, even when he was going that fast - Ooga had seen him trip over a branch and break his neck once. The whole tribe was careless, and took their immortality for granted in everything they did. Things like that had never really registered in his head until after the whole 'if you die, you die forever' thing.

It did make it hard to believe that none of that dying would have happened if Klik hadn't dragged them off on a dangerous journey. Truth be told, they wouldn't have lasted a week if they stayed here. Which meant (ugh) Klik had been right, and the trip had been entirely necessary, and technically he was taking _all_ the credit when he didn't deserve it.

He'd sooner choke on a swordfish than admit it, though.

"Ooga dude," Dooby panted, skidding to a thankfully non-lethal halt. "I found something."

"Did you find Nooby?" Ooga asked, sneaking a glance at the water. There was no sign that Natare had ever been there.

"Sorry, dude, but that's a negative," Dooby said. "But you might want to take a look at what I _did_ find."

-:-:-

"Hello!" Nooby waved to the newcomer as best as he could. It wasn't easy, seeing as he couldn't move his arms or legs, but he still smiled widely at them in welcome. "Is Nooby."

This was all very exciting. Red had strapped him into the weird machine, and everything had gone blurry. It felt like the world was splitting in two around him, or maybe like his head was splitting in two with him still inside, and then -

Well, there was someone new here, so it couldn't have been all bad.

"Uh, hi," said the person who looked like Nooby but was not Nooby. That was a bit of a mouthful, Nooby decided. Not-Nooby was good enough for short. "Nooby? Is that, uh, is that your name?"

Nooby nodded. "Nooby's name is Nooby. Not-Nooby have name also?"

Not-Nooby hesitated. "I don't think so," they said eventually. "How do I get one?"

"Amazing," Red said, clapping his hands delightedly. "Amazing! He has not only an intact soul, but a complete grasp of language and motor functions! This is going even better than I thought it would!"

"Who's He?" Puzzled, Not-Nooby looked between them. "I thought your name was Nooby."

"Red is talking about Not-Nooby," Nooby said. "Nooby understand. Third person words confuse Nooby, too."

"Ah, of course," Red said, fiddling with the straps pinning Nooby to the machine. "Well, seeing as you speak normally, you should be able to manage personal pronouns. It's a part of sentence structure."

"Alright," Not-Nooby said warily.

"All three of us use the pronoun 'he'," Red said. "That is the pronoun we use for boys, you see. In a sentence, it is _he walks on the beach._ Do you follow?"

"Grammatically, yes," Not-Nooby said. "But if we use 'he' for boys, why would all three of us use it?"

"Is Not-Nooby a boy?" Nooby asked. Red finally undid the straps, and he stretched his arms contentedly. Freedom felt a lot better than the cold metal.

"No," Not-Nooby said sourly, crossing their arms. "And I might not know why I know, but I know what a boy is, so don't try to tell me that's what I am."

"Don't be absurd," Red said, smiling jovially. "You are a direct clone of Nooby, and he is a boy. That means you would also be a boy. Gender is something inherent to the soul, and duplication would not change it."

Not-Nooby bared their teeth at Red, revealing a lot of very sharp points. "Listen here, you old coot. You might have made me and you can't take that back, but you do _not_ get to tell me who or what I am. Are we clear?"

Red wasn't smiling anymore. "Perhaps this experiment didn't work after all," he mused. "You don't resemble Nooby at all in temperament. We may have to scrap this one and try again-"

"You want to kill me because I'm not enough like _that guy?_ " Not-Nooby demanded, jabbing a finger at Nooby. "You just created a being with an entirely new soul, you bastard! The second I was born, killing me became murder."

"How do you know what murder is?" Red asked.

"I don't know!" Not-Nooby snapped, sounding more desperate than hostile. "I don't know who I am or why I know any of this stuff, but I do know that I do _not_ want to die. So you can back the hell off, or you can place your bets on whether or not this body knows how to fight!"

Silence.

Then Red laughed, clapping his hands, and Not-Nooby bristled. They didn't look happy even after he quieted down. "Alright, little clone, you've made your point," he said, still chuckling. "Settle down. And no, of course I'm not going to kill you. I can hardly afford to destroy my first successful result!"

Not-Nooby still looked suspicious. "You're not going to call me a boy?"

"Well, duplication is hardly an exact science. There are clearly differences in temperament and mental acuity; who's to say there might not be differences in gender as well? If you say you are not a boy, then I will believe you."

"Now Not-Nooby and Red can be friends!" Nooby piped up. 

Not-Nooby didn't look thrilled at the idea.

"Now, let me see if I can't get you two some shoes and blankets," Red said. "We wouldn't want you to get cold. Keep an eye on each other, and stay where you are."

"Okie dokie!" Nooby said. Not-Nooby grumbled something that sounded like an affirmative. 

Red left with a friendly wave, and then there was silence.

"Not-Nooby want to play a game?" Nooby asked.

"No," Not-Nooby snapped.

"Not-Nooby want to talk to Nooby?" Nooby asked.

"…No," Not-Nooby said, though with less hostility.

"Not-Nooby want to talk all by Not-Nooby's self while Nooby listens?"

Silence.

"Pronouns are dumb," Not-Nooby muttered.

Nooby nodded agreement. "Is why Nooby never uses."

Not-Nooby glanced over, part irritated and part interested. "You don't?"

"Nooby just uses Nooby's name," Nooby said. "Not-Nooby not want third person words either? Not-Nooby could just use name instead."

"I'd need an actual name for that to work," Not-Nooby said.

"Not-Nooby is okay name," Nooby said. "Is like Nooby, but not."

"I guess," Not-Nooby said, looking down. "Is that all I am?"

Nooby didn't answer, watching them curiously.

"…Are you a boy?" Not-Nooby asked.

Nooby shrugged, waggling his hand in an 'ehh' fashion.

"Why didn't you correct him?"

"Nooby is Nooby," Nooby said. "Nooby not really get third person words. Third person words seem silly. Red can use any third person words for Nooby, so long as Red knows Nooby is Nooby."

Not-Nooby sighed, looking down at their feet. "That sounds a lot easier."

"Not-Nooby not get third person words either?"

"Not even a little," they said. "But how am I supposed to tell people what I am when I don't even know myself?"

"Not-Nooby is not Nooby," Nooby said.

"…Yeah," Not-Nooby said, touching their face. "I guess that's a start."

-:-:-

Giant footprints.

"What in the hell," Ooga said, staring down at the imprints in the not-quite-sandy ground. There were dents in the nearby sand that looked similar, but sand didn't hold the shape of an impression nearly as well. But right there, in the mud, were a set of giant footprints - easily three times the size of a normal foot.

"It's humanoid," Klik said from where he was crouched beside the prints. He was fiddling with that telescope thing on his neck, and his glasses were over his eyes. That was Serious Nerd mode if he'd ever seen it. "Whoever left it was definitely a lot bigger than us, and a lot heavier, too. That, and they have an extra toe."

"What do you dudes think it is?" Dooby asked. 

"Some sort of giant pygmy?" Booga shrugged. "I dunno. It's definitely not an animal track. I've never seen anything with feet like that."

"It has odd balance," Klik said, frowning at the footprint. "It must have a really small head, proportionally speaking. A pygmy standing like that would overbalance and topple over. So no, this is probably something else."

_A large stranger took him across the water…_

"Do you think Big Toes here took Nooby?" Ooga asked. "If they came from somewhere else, they must have some sort of boat."

"Hey, look at this!" Klak exclaimed, standing up and holding something out. "This was in the brush over there."

"A coconut?" Klik asked.

"That's Nooby's coconut," Ooga said, his heart sinking even further as he recognized the crude smiley face. "He never goes anywhere without it."

"So he dropped it when he went with Big Toes?" Booga asked.

"He would have taken it if he could," Ooga said. "Meaning Big Toes took him against his will."

Klik rubbed his chin, his brow furrowing. "So it really was someone outside the tribe," he murmured. "Someone took him."

 _Of course it was,_ Ooga was about to snap, _did you think one of us did it?_

For once, though, he caught himself before blurting it out, because it occurred to him that maybe Klik _had_ thought that. Maybe Klik had thought he had done it. It wouldn't be the first time he'd been blamed for something he didn't do.

Ooga swallowed the irrational anger rising in him, forcing it back down. Trapping Nooby somewhere and making the whole tribe look for him wasn't exactly out of character for him. Thinking it might be him wasn't unreasonable. Besides, Klik hadn't been unfair, or treated him differently at all - he'd given him the benefit of the doubt and looked anyways. 

Getting defensive wouldn't help things. This wasn't suspicion, it was trust. Relatively.

"We have to go after him," Klik said, standing up. His eyes were grim, and there was no room for argument in them. He had made up his mind. "Gather enough food and supplies for a couple of days, and pack a bundle of spears. We'll leave as soon as we can."

If Klik kept being this awesome, Ooga would like him a lot more.

"You can't be serious!" Klak protested. "What's the point of that?"

"He just got kidnapped by some giant extra-toed thing, and he's off there by himself," Ooga snapped. "We can't just _leave_ him there. He's probably scared shitless all by himself, wherever he is."

"He'll be _fine!"_ Klak said sourly. "He can just regenerate back if he has to. I mean, it's not like Big Toes would be worried about him killing himself to escape. If they knew he could regenerate, they'd have taken the Gem."

"What, you don't care enough to go after him?"

"Oh, sure, not wanting to go on a huge, _pointless_ expedition makes me a terrible person," Klak said, crossing his arms. "Big talk from someone like you. If you were really concerned about his emotional health, you wouldn't be killing him for sport."

If Klak kept running his mouth, Ooga would punch him in the throat.

"We need to go either way," Klik said, holding up his hands to pacify them. "We know there's something out there, and it's not above kidnapping us. This is the first person outside our tribe we've ever heard of, and it might be a serious threat on top of that. That's not something we can just ignore. We need to find it and figure out as much about it as we can."

"We don't even know where he is!" Klak said, crossing his arms. "We're not going to catch up to them with a head start like that. We don't even know which way they went!"

"East," Ooga said.

Klik and Klak both looked over, surprised. "How do you know that?" Klik asked.

_Oh, a magic glowing fish told me. Did I mention I talk to a magic glowing fish sometimes? Because that's apparently something I do._

"It's not for sure," Ooga said. "But the way the currents work, chances are Big Toes came in from the east if they landed here. If we're lucky, we might be able to see any islands they came from if they went back that way."

Klak raised an eyebrow, but didn't comment on that. The great thing about being the only fisher in the tribe was that he could basically pull any water facts out of his ass and they wouldn't be able to dispute it. "If we can spot something like that, sure."

Klik tapped the gadget around his neck, giving Klak a little half-smile. "Don't worry about that. I can handle it."

Man, Klik was on a roll here. Ooga was a little worried that he might start to respect him more permanently at this rate.

"Do we have a way to get over there?" Klak asked, more resigned than anything else.

"I started building something," Klik said. "I can finish it in a few hours. It won't be anything spectacular, but it'll do the job."

"What did you build?" Booga asked.

"A raft," Klik said. "What else?"

"Oh. Yeah, I guess so."

"What were you expecting, a flying machine?" Klak asked.

"Shut up, Klak."

"Can you build a flying machine?" Ooga asked, despite himself.

"Be serious," Klik said with a sigh. "Dooby, you'll stay here and watch the Gem. It's not safe to leave it unattended."

"You got it, dude," Dooby said, giving him a thumbs up.

"Everyone else, pack what you need and get ready to leave." Klik glanced out at the water, and Ooga followed his gaze, searching for any sign of Natare. The ethereal fish was nowhere in sight. "We've got a large stranger to pay a visit to."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My update schedule is a lot faster when I'm busy procrastinating important schoolwork.


	4. Across the ocean

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything's coming together.

"This is bullcrap," Booga complained. 

That was an awfully kind way to put it. Ooga had been completely on board with the rescue mission to a strange island. Based on his experience with other islands, he knew it would be dangerous, and probably unpleasant. He had been ready for all sorts of terrible things like vicious monkeys, giant snakes, blood-sucking parasites and flesh-eating spiders, even an honest to gods _dinosaur._ He would have been willing to deal with that. Not happy, but he'd put up with it. 

_That_ qualified as bullcrap. He had been ready for bullcrap. This went _way_ beyond bullcrap and all the way into _legitimate causes for a descent into nihilistic despair._

At least it wasn't zombies again.

"An entire island made out of ice," Klik said, crouching and picking up a loose chunk of it. "How is this possible? The climate here shouldn't be able to support…"

"What _is_ this stuff?" Klak asked, bouncing from foot to foot. "And why does it hurt your feet? Is it made out of acid or something?"

"It's just frozen water," Klik said. "It hurts because it's so unbelievably cold that it can damage bare skin. I've never seen it before, but I've read descriptions… I thought it was a myth, or a metaphor at best."

"Great," Ooga muttered. "Mythical solid water. This day can't get any better. Oh, wait, yes it can - we can find Nooby and get the hell off this rock."

"Technically, it's not a rock," Klik said.

"I choose to believe that you are _not_ correcting me because you're a nerd and instead doing it because it's funny," Ooga said. "Congrats, Klik, you found your sense of humour after all these long years. I knew you could do it."

Yes, he was being unnecessarily salty. No, he did not care. His feet hurt and he wanted to go home, but he wasn't allowed to say that, because this had been his idea. This was not a fun situation to be in. He was allowed to be a bit more of a piece of shit than usual.

"Hey, look at this," Booga said, scuffing the ice and then peering down at it. "This powdery stuff leaves awesome tracks. Probably even better than sand-mud."

"Really?" Klik hurried over to take a look himself. "Wow, you're right. This will make finding Nooby much easier. There's only one other person on this island capable of leaving pygmy tracks. If we find that trail, we find him."

"Problem," Klak said. "If this ground holds tracks that well, we might get our tracks mixed up with his."

"We can wear skins on our feet," Klik said. "Probably for the best, anyways. This ground will hurt us if we don't have protection from it, and we only have one life to spend over here."

"Yeah, let's do that," Booga said, wincing and shaking his legs. "My toes feel like they're going to fall off."

"Another problem," Klak said, frowning. "Nooby was taken against his will. If he was allowed to walk, he would have just run. Big Toes might have just carried him."

"Alright, mister problem-pointer, we get it," Ooga said with an exasperated sigh. "The plan sucks and this is dumb. Pointing out every single flaw without suggesting a solution isn't going to make it better. Can we get moving already?"

"Hey, I'm trying to help," Klak retorted. "We could, you know, _improve_ the plan if we know what's wrong with it. How do you expect to get anything done if you don't think about it first?"

"By actually _doing_ stuff," Ooga said, crossing his arms and giving Klak his best 'really?' look. "You know, that thing that normal people do instead of complaining? Standing around talking isn't going to get Nooby back."

"Yeah, I'm with Ooga," Booga said. "Can we go or what?"

"Everyone shut up and focus," Klik snapped. "Klak, we need to move before we're spotted. Ooga, calm down. Booga? Get tracking."

_I'm coming, Nooby. Just hang in there._

-:-:-

Making friends with Not-Nooby was not going according to plan.

Not-Nooby kept fidgeting, poking at their chest and arms, prodding their own body like they were expecting something to happen. They snapped at Red with as much wit as Ooga and twice the venom, and when Red gave up on trying to talk to them, they went right back to poking and fuming. Whenever Nooby tried to approach them, they spat insults and shrank away from him.

They'd been like this ever since they saw their reflection in the water.

"I don't get it," he heard them mutter. "Why doesn't this stuff come off?"

"Not-Nooby looks like Nooby," Nooby said, watching them intently. "But Not-Nooby doesn't sound like Nooby."

"Yeah, no shit," Not-Nooby snapped. "That's because I'm _not you,_ dipshit."

Nooby giggled. "Now Not-Nooby sounds like Ooga."

"Like what?"

"Best friend Ooga!" Nooby gestured at the open water. "Best friend Ooga is back home with rest of tribe."

"Wait, you mean like… another person?" That got Not-Nooby's attention. "In the water?"

"No, tribe is on other island," Nooby said. 

"Another _island?"_

"Is where Nooby came from!" He wasn't sure why Not-Nooby was so interested all of a sudden, but he was glad they were getting along again. "Has sand instead of cold."

"Sand," Not-Nooby repeated. "That's… little rocks. Lots of little rocks in big piles."

"Little rocks!" Nooby agreed. "Is the beach!"

"Beach." Not-Nooby frowned. "Why do I know that? I've never seen… anything."

"Nooby got sand stuck in eyes before," Nooby said. "Nooby did not have lots of fun that day."

"Right, uh, Nooby," Not-Nooby said, leaning forward. "What else is on your island?"

"Trees!" Nooby said at once, smiling. "Big, big trees with birds sometimes."

"Trees," Not-Nooby said, brow furrowing. "Long plants. And birds are… weird, noisy things that fly in the air. Those are _real?"_

"Has fish too," Nooby said.

"Fish - hey, I've seen those." They almost sounded friendly, now that they were more focused on thinking than on being angry. "Those are the little swimming things with no arms or legs."

"Not-Nooby is good at this!" Nooby exclaimed.

"Yeah, I… I guess I am." Not-Nooby shrugged, looking down at the ground. "I don't know why I know any of that. It doesn't make any sense."

"Now Not-Nooby sounds like Klik," Nooby said. 

"Klik? What's that?"

"Is another friend from tribe," Nooby said, nodding sagely. "Very smart. _Very."_

"Very smart, huh?" Not-Nooby seemed pleased at that. "Guess there are worse things to sound like."

"What other things does Not-Nooby know to guess?" Nooby asked.

"Uh… something big, and sharp, and nasty," said Not-Nooby. "In the water."

"Is shark?"

"A shark," repeated Not-Nooby, frowning. "I don't like that."

"Shark is scary," Nooby agreed. "Tries to eat tribe sometimes."

"It tries to _eat_ you?"

Not-Nooby sounded horrified. Nooby smiled to reassure them things were fine. "Tribe is okay, though. See? Nooby is okay."

"That's one tough tribe," Not-Nooby muttered.

"Not-Nooby knows what tribe is?"

"It's…" Something strange crossed their face. "People?"

"Is friends," Nooby said. "Tribe is people who stay friends forever and ever."

"I… don't remember that," Not-Nooby said, shaking their head. "I didn't know that."

"Not-Nooby not have tribe?"

"I guess not."

They sounded a bit defeated. He couldn't have that. "Is okay," Nooby said brightly. "Not-Nooby can be part of Nooby's tribe!"

It took a moment, but eventually Not-Nooby smiled a little. Their teeth were pointed, and their face and eyes looked different, but their smile looked like his. "Okay."

Nooby smiled back, wide and friendly, and everything was alright.

"Are you two having a nice time?" Red asked. Nooby looked over to see him standing in the entrance to the room, smiling that friendly smile of his. 

"Nooby is having nice time!" Nooby agreed. 

"I guess," Not-Nooby said, but they didn't look as happy as they had a moment ago. Nooby had the sense that they didn't like Red much at all. 

"I'm going to cook us some fish soon," Red said. He looked especially jovial at the mention of cooking and food, Nooby noted. That was a feeling Nooby knew well. "It will be our first dinner as a family! Isn't that exciting?"

"I didn't ask to be part of this family," Not-Nooby grumbled.

"Now, now, settle down," Red said, his voice going a little stern. "There's no need for that kind of talk."

"It's not some extravagant political position, it's a statement of fact!" Not-Nooby bared their teeth at him. "You didn't ask me for my opinion on any of this!"

Red was not smiling anymore. "You're a part of this family," he said, staring down at them. "You should act like it, little one."

The room felt a lot colder.

Not-Nooby looked away first, hunching their shoulders and staring at the ground. They didn't say anything else.

"That's the way," Red said, his smile back in place immediately. "You two get ready for dinner! I'll have it ready soon enough."

"Okie dokie!" Nooby said brightly. Food sounded great at this point. He hadn't eaten all day.

"And remember," Red said, stepping back outside the door. "Stay in the room."

He didn't wait for a reply, and in moments, he was gone again.

"Is Not-Nooby okay?" Nooby asked.

"I don't think I like it here," Not-Nooby mumbled. They were still curled in on themself, looking distinctly uncomfortable. "I want to go… I don't know. Somewhere else."

Nooby nodded. "Nooby wants to go home, too."

Not-Nooby looked up, alarmed. "You're going to leave?"

Snappish and grumbly as they were, Not-Nooby didn't strike him as a bad person. Just confused, and a little prone to being a conniving asshole. 

"Not-Nooby not worry," Nooby said. "Tribe will come and get Nooby, and then Not-Nooby can come back with Nooby to home island. Is much warmer!"

"Oh." Not-Nooby considered that, then nodded. "Okay. That sounds good."

"Not-Nooby is going to love tribe!" Nooby bounced, rubbing his hands together both in excitement and to keep them warm. "Tribe is nice and fun. Nooby sure that tribe will love Not-Nooby, too!"

"Are you sure?" Not-Nooby asked. "I mean, what if they think I'm just some knock-off version of you? I don't even have my own name."

"Not-Nooby is not Nooby," Nooby said. "Nooby and Not-Nooby talk very different! Not-Nooby is more like new, different Nooby."

"New Nooby," Not-Nooby repeated. "I guess I could work with that."

"Newoobie," Nooby said, and giggled.

Not-Nooby scowled. "No. That sounds dumb."

Nooby stuck out his tongue.

"Newbie," said Not-Nooby, crossing their arms. "Until I come up with something better."

"Okie dokie!" Nooby agreed. "Not-Nooby can be Newbie Nooby."

"Just Newbie," Newbie said.

"Just sure is common name," Nooby said.

Newbie rolled their eyes, pushing themself to their feet. "Whatever. I'm going to go look around outside."

"Nooby not think Nooby and Just Newbie are supposed to do that," Nooby said, frowning. "Red said Nooby and Just Newbie should stay in hut."

"That's reason enough not to do it," Newbie said. "I don't trust that guy at all. He must be hiding something out there."

Nooby shrugged.

"You don't have to come with me," Newbie said. "I'm just going out for a quick walk, anyways. I'll come back and tell you if I find anything."

"Just Newbie is sure?"

"Why not?" Newbie shrugged, stretching their arms above their head. "Besides, if we're going to get rescued by your tribe, we can't just stay in here forever. They'll never find us if we don't give them a hand in doing it."

"Ooh, Just Newbie will leave trail of crumbs for tribe to follow?" Nooby asked.

Newbie flashed him a grin that was a little more devious than his own. "Something like that, yeah. I don't have crumbs, but I do have the next best thing. Have you noticed how well this snow holds footprints?"

Nooby glanced down at where the ground was covered in scattered marks from their feet. "Just Newbie is good at noticing things."

"Thanks," Newbie said. 

"Just Newbie will be back soon?"

"Yeah, I won't be gone long," Newbie said. "Don't want to get caught by Red. I'll be back in twenty minutes, tops."

Nooby nodded decisively. "Okie dokie! Nooby will keep Just Newbie's blanket warm."

Newbie gave him a quick wave, peeking out the door before slipping out as quietly as they could in the crunching snow. They looked most similar to him when they were enjoying themself, Nooby decided. And they didn't seem to dislike him the way they disliked Red. That had to be a good sign.

Maybe this meant a chance at a new friend after all.

-:-:-

It had taken a solid fifteen minutes of miserable, terrible, torturous walking that Ooga was sure would disfigure his feet so badly that he'd regenerate with frostbite, even with skins on his feet, but Booga picked up a trail.

"Holy shit," Booga said, dropping into a crouch and staring at the fresh, clear footprint. "That's his footprint."

"What?" Ooga asked, the exhaustion and unspoken complaints about the cold vanishing in an instant. "Are you sure?"

"It's definitely Nooby's," Booga said, and he was grinning. They were all grinning, even Klak. This sort of result was exactly what they needed. "And it's really fresh, too. Looks like we were right after all. He's on the island."

"Can you track it?" Klik asked.

"No problem," Booga said, his head swivelling back and forth. "Haven't seen tracks this straightforward in years. Might as well be throwing up a smoke signal for us."

"Atta boy, Nooby," Ooga said under his breath. "Well? Let's get moving."

He couldn't stop the hope rising in his chest, sparking around his lungs and making him itch to move faster. The others were too slow. His legs were too slow. Even his thinking was too slow, his brain too fast for his brain. It was all too slow, he needed this to be done _now_ and if reality wouldn't hurry up and keep pace with that he was going to bash his head into the ice and-

_Whoa, whoa, geez. Focus, buddy. We're not out of this mess yet._

He'd just get dirty looks if he tried to make the others go faster. Ooga hummed to himself instead, tapping a double-time against his arms as he pressed them to his chest for warmth. It was an outlet for the itch to speed up, at least on the physical level. The others knew better than to pay him any mind.

Nooby was close, at the end of this trail. What could go wrong? What would stop this from happening, and how could he stop that first? If he was going to go fast-brain, he might as well put it to some use.

_Make sure the trail doesn't get erased or scuffed by anyone. Watch for threats. That Big Toes guy is around here somewhere, right? That might be trouble._

Find Nooby, regenerate him back, go home. It was a simple enough mission. Nice, easy and straightforward.

_And then apparently I need to fight some other totem for Natare. Geez, why does this sort of thing always happen to me?_

Whatever. Klak and Booga probably wouldn't want to stick around, but Klik was looking at the ice in that way he got when he couldn't leave well enough alone. He'd probably be willing to take a look around if it meant figuring out how the ice island worked.

_So, hey, Klik. I know you don't like me, and you've been pissed with me for getting to see those asshole gods instead of you, but I've gotta ask a favour. Could you maybe help me fight one of those gods? Oh, yeah, and apparently I can see these gods all the time now, and I'm slowly becoming besties with a sarcastic ghost fish. I promised this ghost fish that I'd literally fight a deity for them, so could you maybe give me a hand? I'll totally owe you one. I'd even help you take weird nerd notes on why this bullshit island exists and everything._

His life sure had gotten stupid.

"The trail is kind of muddled here," Booga said aloud, pulling him back to reality. He straightened to his full height, stretching and cracking his back. "But it's fresh. As in, Nooby was probably here a couple of minutes ago. He can't be far."

"Split up, then," Klik said. "We cover as much ground as possible before he gets the chance to make it too far off."

"No need for that," Klak's voice was hushed, but he could still hear the excitement in it. "Look!"

Ooga followed his gaze, looking in the direction Klak was pointing. It was just ice at first glance, but when he looked closer, he could make out the hidden trail among the high ice outcroppings.

That wasn't all, though. For a brief moment, he saw a familiar silhouette dart from behind one piece of large ice to another, and his heart sped up.

"Oh, thank the gods," Klik said, relief plain to hear in his voice. "He's okay."

Ooga didn't hear anything else, because he was dashing forward with no care for how the ice stung his feet, all but tumbling into the hidden trail in his haste.

No, he hadn't imagined it. Nooby was standing right there, poised behind one of the outcroppings and glancing warily from side to side. There was no mistaking that cracked hairbone, or every familiar freckle on his shoulders and back.

He was there. He was _there._

"Nooby!" The word burst past his lips before he knew what was happening. It was a little loud - probably not wise, considering the whole 'Big Toes is around here' thing, but did it matter at this point? Ooga could probably nail him from there with the spear if things went _completely_ disastrous in the next two seconds. He was allowed to have this little slip-up.

Nooby turned quickly, startled by the sound of his voice. The sort of quick that usually belonged to someone who was doing something they weren't supposed to, Ooga mused. Was Nooby sneaking out? Was he breaking some sort of rule? Was he being - dared he hope? Dared he dream? - a delinquent? 

_Hey, good for you, buddy! I always knew I could count on you to come keep me company someday._

That was for later, though. Ooga skidded to a halt in front of him, looking him up and down worriedly. He didn't look bruised, or particularly beaten up - maybe a little malnourished, though. Had this bastard been starving him? What about water, had he gotten enough of that?

_Okay, wow, you need to chill. You're literally going to impale him on a spear to send him home. You do remember that whether or not he's eaten makes zero difference to his total wellbeing, right?_

"Are you okay?" Ooga asked, a little out of breath.

Nooby nodded mutely.

_Note to self: never breathe a word of any of what you just thought to anyone, because not a single one of them will ever let you live it down._

Nooby was staring at him. Ooga grinned, letting the relief sweep over him. "Boy oh boy, buddy, am I glad to see you."

Even as he said it, though, his skin prickled uneasily. Something was off. Nooby wasn't moving forward or smiling, or acting like he recognized him at all. Something about the way he stood, the way he moved - he looked so tense, like Ooga had startled him and he was ready to lash out.

Nooby was still staring at him. There was something _very_ wrong there, insisted his gut. What was so weird about that? What was so weird that he felt frozen in place?

"Oh!" Nooby's face broke out into a grin, relaxing. His teeth were too sharp. "You're here already?"

_That's not his voice. That's now how he talks._

The eyes. His eyes were all wrong. Those weren't the eyes he remembered.

Ooga took a step back. "Nooby?" he asked, but the relief he had felt was already draining away. His voice came out weak and shaky.

"No," said Nooby, and the hair on his back stood on end at the alien voice. It was reminiscent of Nooby's voice, but the tone, the enunciation - it was wrong, all wrong. "I'm Newbie. Well, I mean, it's sort of a work in progress, but-"

"Oh, sweet, he's still here?" The others had caught up to him, by the sound of it. Booga didn't give the phony a second look, just shooting a wary glance from side to side. "Great. Hurry up and kill him, will you? I want to get off this rock-"

"Kill?" The phony's voice rose, and they backed away, looking horrified. "What do you mean, kill? You're supposed to be-"

"Wait, did Nooby just use a second-person pronoun?" Klak sounded bewildered. No surprise there, Ooga thought numbly, this was reason enough to be confused. Even so, Klak wasn't one to just accept it when something didn't make sense, and he was getting more suspicious with every passing moment. "What in the world happened while you were - whoa. Nooby, what the hell happened to your eyes?"

"I'm not Nooby, you ignorant, backstabbing pile of muck!" spat the phony. "And if you had half a set of working eyes or brains between you, you'd know it when you try to murder someone and get the wrong guy!"

That was… a pretty solid set of insults. He might have used them himself. Nooby definitely would not have. Ooga wasn't sure if he wanted to laugh or cry.

He ended up being overcome by an intense, overwhelming fury, so he decided that was probably a 'none of the above'.

He had been so close. This had almost been over - no, it had been over, he'd felt the triumph and relief of victory and everything. Nooby had been right there, and then somehow, he'd been stolen away all over again.

_Okay, that's it. From now on, we're going directly from point A to point B._

And gods help anyone who happened to be standing in the way.

"Where is Nooby?" Ooga snarled.

"You think I'd tell you?" retorted the phony, holding their ground. "You just told me you're here to kill them!"

"Uh, hey, hang on," Klak said. "You do realize that we-"

"I hate to break it to you, _buddy,_ but you're outnumbered one to four," Ooga said, ignoring Klak completely. "So if you want to hang on to your own status of _alive,_ I suggest you start talking."

The phony balked, eyes wide. He could see the fear flash across their face, and their eyes went to the spear in his hands for the first time, lingering on the sharp point. 

"What did you do to him?" Ooga advanced, and they backed away, pressing themself flat against the icy wall. "Tell me!"

"I didn't do anything!" snapped the phony, baring all their pointy teeth at him. He wasn't fooled by this display of bravado; he knew a bluff when he saw one. "Now back off, you blue-eyed freak!"

That stung more than he thought it would. Sure, he was the only one with blue eyes, but it wasn't like that meant anything. No big deal.

He wasn't sure why he lashed out with the spear.

The tip grazed the side of their arm, scratching it ever so slightly as they shielded their face. Hissing with fear and pain, the phony skittered to the side, trying to put some distance between themself and his weapon. 

_Fast reflexes. They're good._

Ooga moved as if to follow, feinting forwards and then lunging directly at them when they slowed. Their eyes widened, instantly realizing his ploy, but there was no chance to dodge this time. They were pinned and he had momentum on his side.

_Gotcha._

The phony threw up a hand, knocking the spear aside. It cut the side of their palm, and he heard them hiss, but that was the extent of the damage. All the force behind the attack was deflected into the wall, and the spear jammed into the ice with a loud crack.

This guy was an infuriatingly fast thinker.

"Leave me alone!" yelled the phony, swiping at him with a punch. Ooga drew back, out of range, and yanked the spear with him. The tip wasn't in great shape, but it would still-

"Ooga, stop!"

Oh, great. Here came the meddling parade.

"Ooga!" Yeah, there it was. Klik was in front of him, pushing him back. He sounded somewhere between alarmed and deeply annoyed. "That's not Nooby, you can't-"

"I _know,"_ Ooga growled, drawing back the spear again.

"Leave them alone, Ooga!" Oh, that was the stern look. Klik spread his arms, shielding the phony with his body, and looked him right in the eye. "Stop. Now."

The anger ebbed enough for him to force his temper back down, and Ooga gritted his teeth, lowering the spear a little.

"Better," Klik said, glancing back at the phony. "Are you-?"

He didn't get an answer, because the phony bolted before he could finish the question, vanishing around a block of ice. They didn't reappear.

"Great," Klik said with a sigh. "There goes the one person who might have known where Nooby is."

_I screwed up again._

"We can find him ourselves," Ooga said, brushing that off. "Let's just do it quick. This cold is killing me, and I don't want that to get literal."

Booga and Klak, who hadn't moved to attack or to stop him, didn't say anything. Klak looked at him strangely, but didn't comment, and he looked away when Ooga raised an eyebrow at him. 

It wasn't that big a deal, Ooga told himself. Attacking the phony wouldn't stop them from finding Nooby. All they had lost was a potential guide that they probably couldn't have trusted anyways. It was a small setback, and he could power through it. 

Somehow, though, he still had the sense that he had just made a big mistake.

-:-:-

Out of all the Realms, Oceanus was known for its strange relation to patience.

Other Realms were fairly straightforward in this regard. Animus was patient, insofar that it was willing to stalk its prey and wait for the right moment to strike, but it was hardly one to wait more than ten minutes for it. Pax was willing to wait centuries to develop complexity stone by stone, and much more concerned about whether something would last through the next eon than the next day, but it always dealt in the long game. Aeris was infamous for having no patience whatsoever. Even Infernus, which lived and fought in the moment but still would wait millions of years before claiming enough of the world to overpower the others, was predictable once one got past this duality of nature.

Oceanus, though, refused to be categorized. It could be as flighty as Aeris one moment and as enduring as Pax the next. From the quick, darting fish to the slow, regular pull of the tides, Oceanus spanned every state of patience and impatience at once. Years slid off of them like raindrops. Seconds would determine whether the shark's teeth met flesh or water. It was a true contradiction in the nature of their Realm, but one they made no move to resolve.

There was no time in the deep unknowable of the abyss.

Natare pondered this as they swam in loose, lazy circles around the ice island, watching intently for any sign of change. This contradiction was exactly what would make all the difference today. The decades they had spent waiting were coming to a close, and they were no worse the wear for it. Now the result would be compressed into a single day, and they had to be ready to react on a split second.

_Mortals live such fast lives._

Despite the sheer power of the enemy, Natare was optimistic about their little fish and this mission. This would be the tipping point. Throwing a mortal into the mix was a move that was usually frowned upon, but it was guaranteed to change things up. This invasion of their territory absolutely merited such a drastic measure. 

If throwing a mortal into the mix happened to drag another five mortals into it… well, Animus had started this. Natare couldn't be held accountable for any unnecessary havoc wreaked.

(Oceanus was also known for being prone to fits of petty vengeance.)

Natare laughed to themself, blowing a satisfied bubble and watching it float up to the surface. This nuisance of a totem would be out of their way soon enough. They weren't entirely sure what would happen, not with all these variables in play, but they were confident that it would be fun.

Not yet, though. The island was still under the reign of an enemy totem. They could not approach it.

Natare blew another bubble, fins waving to keep themself moving steadily as they watched the ice island, and waited.

-:-:-

The presence of the phony made this much more complicated. Tracking Nooby would be almost impossible. Booga had spotted footprints and said they almost definitely belonged to Nooby, but with someone identical to him running around…

_Now this? This is bullcrap._

Klik had decided to follow the tracks anyways, even knowing that they probably belonged to the phony. "They might lead us to Nooby, or to some sort of explanation how he got cloned in the first place," Klik had said. "We should try talking to them this time."

Yeah, yeah, he got the point. Trying to stab the phony hadn't been his smartest move. Klik could stop vaguely referring to him without naming names now.

The tracks soon became wild and difficult to follow, zigging and zagging and doubling back on themselves. Even Ooga could tell that the phony was trying to throw them off the scent. They weren't doing too bad a job of it, either. It apparently took all of Booga's concentration (limited as it might be) to keep up, and he was unusually quiet as he followed the trail.

"Canny bastard," Ooga muttered.

"I don't get it," Klak said, frowning. "Why would they bother with this sort of thing? It's not like they've got anywhere to go."

"Isn't that a reason to do it?" Ooga asked. "I mean, if they tripped us up now, they could hide somewhere on the island. They don't have a lot of options."

"But why would they walk in the snow at all?" Klak asked. "If they wanted to get away from us, they should be sticking to the ice as much as possible. It would be a lot harder to get any tracks at all out of that, and they'd run faster besides."

"They're probably scared," Klik said, his voice soft. "They won't make perfectly clear or reasonable decisions."

"This way," Booga said, trotting down a path to the left without looking to see if they were following. 

"Don't underestimate them," Ooga said, glancing back at Klik. He had seemed pretty quiet after seeing the phony, too. What was up with him? "This Fake Nooby thinks fast, and from what I can tell, they're good under pressure. We can't let our guard down."

"We need a name for this guy," Klak muttered. "Fake Nooby is a mouthful."

"Think they called themself Newbie back there," Ooga said. "Maybe. It's kinda hard to tell."

"They called themself Nooby? That's going to get confusing fast."

"No, I think it was different," Ooga said. "Newbie. Like Nooby, but with an _eww._ You know?"

"If we catch up to them, we can ask them," Klik said.

"I'm not so sure this guy is friendly, Klik," Klak said. When Ooga looked over, he was frowning. "And not just because Ooga jumped them. At the very least, they seem like they'd cause us trouble."

"This is the first person we've ever met outside our tribe," Klik said, more forceful than Ooga had expected. His expression was closed, a distinct not-happy-about-this look. "And they're clearly tied to us in an irreversible way. We can't just charge into this without more information."

"Well, we can't just sit around, either," Ooga snapped. "We don't have time to make a foolproof plan. We'll just have to work it out as we go along."

"We need to be realistic," Klak said, shaking his head. "I'm not saying we should gut the guy on sight, but we're not in a position to play nice, Klik. Fake Nooby isn't going to go easy on us. We've only got one life to spend here, and someone like that might take those out pretty fast."

"Someone like that?" Klik asked.

"I think Ooga's right about them being a fast thinker under pressure," Klak said, gesturing at the footprints. "This whole thing? Walking in complicated snow patterns instead of fast ones on the ice? I think they did it on purpose."

"That doesn't seem like it would help them get away faster, or make it harder for us to track them," Ooga said.

"Yeah," Klak said. "But it does mean we'd spend a lot more time in roughly the same area."

Klik straightened, looking from side to side in alarm. "You think they're trying to set a trap for us?"

"Maybe," Klak said. "Or maybe they're just stalling."

"Stalling for what?" Ooga asked.

"Guys!" Booga hissed, gesturing for them to approach. "C'mere! But keep your voices down, and don't step too loud."

Conversation immediately dropped, the three of them crowded closer to where Booga indicated. "Listen," Booga muttered, touching what seemed to be a solid wall of ice. "It's thin. There's something on the other side."

Ooga pressed his ear to the ice, wincing at the cold, and listened. There was definitely some sort of muffled sound coming from the other side. If he didn't know better, he could swear it sounded like…

Humming?

"The hell is that?" Klak muttered.

Booga just shrugged.

"Shh!" Klik raised a hand to silence them, his head tilted slightly. He wasn't near the ice, but he looked like he was listening intently. "I hear something."

Ooga pulled away from the ice, listening himself. It took a moment, but sure enough, he heard a rapid tapping from somewhere nearby.

"Footsteps," Klik said, his voice hushed. "Getting closer. They sound like pygmy."

They all settled down to listen, keeping quiet and still as the footsteps hurried down into the same place the humming was coming from. It grew steadily louder, until the owner skidded to a halt almost directly next to their listening spot.

"Red!" panted a familiar voice. "There you are. We have a problem!"

Ooga glanced sharply at Booga, who nodded. That was the phony's voice. They sounded frantic and out of breath, and by the sound of it, they were pretty close by on the other side of the wall. At least the conversation would be audible.

"What are you doing out of the room, little one?" That was… someone else. Who was that? Was that Big Toes? "I told you not to leave there. The food will be ready soon, if you'll just be patient."

"Okay, yes, I know that," Newbie said, voice full of irritation at being interrupted. "Me doing things I shouldn't have is pretty much the least important part of this situation, so can we focus on the part where there are strangers on the island already?"

Man, he didn't like the guy, but he had to admit the phony was pretty relatable.

"Strangers?" That got Big Toes' attention. "Are you sure?"

"Four of them," Newbie said. "They're on the island, and they're not up to anything good."

"Goodness me, little one, are you alright?" Big Toes sounded less severe and more worried, now. "Your hand is bleeding…"

"I'm fine. Let's just say I learned they were armed and dangerous the hard way."

Everyone shot a look at Ooga.

"Listen," Ooga said, but he wasn't really sure what to say to that.

"They want to kill Nooby," Newbie said, and maybe he was imagining it, but they sounded… genuinely distressed about that. "I heard them, Red, they're here to kill them. If they hadn't run into me first-"

"Oh, my," said Big Toes, who was apparently called Red. "This is certainly a grave situation. You run along and stay with Nooby, little one. I'll handle these ruffians."

"Right!"

Newbie hurried off, their feet pattering on the ice, until even that tiny sound was gone.

"We have to follow them," Klak hissed. "They'll take us straight to-"

"Straight to Nooby?" Red asked, raising his voice a little louder to be clearly heard through the ice wall, and Ooga's heart plummeted. "Well, yes, I suppose they would. It's a good thing I'm here to prevent anything like that, isn't it?"

_Shit._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Mintcraze01 and their long, lovely comment, we have another chapter. Seriously, that comment made my day. And also made me get off my ass and write this thing. I live on nothing but attention and spite. Everyone thank Mintcraze01 for being awesome.
> 
> It costs 0$ to comment on my stuff and nothing convinces me to get up and write quite like attention. comments are great. i love comments and i love you


	5. Boss monsters are always Animus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You'd think something made of ice would be Oceanus, but nope.

They barely made it five steps.

The ice wall exploded behind them, and Ooga covered his head instinctively, squeezing his eyes shut. Shrapnel flew everywhere, and his arms stung as ice chips struck and bounced off. He heard someone nearby curse.

"Keep running!" Klik shouted once the thunderous crashing had died down, from somewhere ahead of him. 

Didn't need to tell him twice. His feet were moving on autopilot, keeping him moving at a dead sprint, but he cracked his eyes open to see where he was going.

_What the hell was that?_

Ooga glanced behind him to see something that - well, it looked humanoid, but it was way too big to be a pygmy. It was at least three times the height of any of them, and even more times the girth. He didn't need to look at its feet to know that there would be an extra toe.

The stranger. Big Toes. Red. This was the thing that had kidnapped Nooby.

This was also someone who could apparently blast through solid walls of ice and chase after them without breaking a sweat, because that was exactly what Red was doing.

"Watch out!" Ooga yelled, whipping around to face forwards again. "He's gaining on us!"

_Damn it, we don't have time for this! We have to find Nooby!_

Outrunning this guy was going to be easier said than done, and with him chasing them all over the island, they'd never get around to saving Nooby. Their odds might actually be better if they went on the offensive and all mobbed Red at once.

Apparently Booga had the same idea, because he skidded to a halt, despite being the furthest ahead of any of them. "You guys keep going!" he shouted. "I'll hold this guy off!"

_Or we could send our tank at him. That works too._

Ooga slowed, letting himself catch his breath and watch Booga face the incoming stranger head-on. Couldn't let this chance slip by. If there was no opening, he'd be poised to run, but he was handy enough with a spear and enough of an opportunist to back Booga up in a toss-up. Klik and Klak were both slowing, too - hopefully they would be watching for the same reason.

Booga charged, swinging his spear with a defiant shout-

And stopped quite abruptly as Red punched him square in the chest.

Even from that distance, he could hear the awful _CRACK_ of bones giving out, and Ooga winced. Booga collapsed instantly, wheezing and spitting out blood. His chest looked a little malformed with all the broken ribs jutting at odd angles. Red pulled back, watching Booga writhe and cough, his jovial smile not budging.

"Now, now," Red said. "You can't expect to walk into my home and try to divide my new family without consequences."

"What in the name of the gods-" Klik breathed.

"Okay, time to go!" Klak shouted, grabbing them both by the arms and dragging them along at a run. "That is a lot of _nope_ right there, and we're going in the exact opposite direction!"

Ooga had to agree.

They sprinted across the frozen ground, and when Ooga dared glance behind them, Red was following at almost a leisurely pace. It reminded him of Cavae, the nonchalant way he moved. Not because of apathy, Ooga realized, but because there was no hope for escape. That was the biggest predator around and the prey had nowhere to go.

_Why bother wasting energy running around when all you have to do is follow at a walking speed?_

"We need to find Nooby and get out of here!" Klik panted from Klak's other side. 

"We should split up," Klak said, glancing behind them. "We'll cover more ground, and make that guy chase us down one by one."

"Comforting," Ooga muttered.

"There's a corner coming up," Klik said, squinting. "I think it heads inland. We should split up as soon as we round it. Got it?"

"Got it," Ooga said, and Klak echoed it a moment later.

"Alright, on three!"

The thudding of feet on ice and racing hearts filled his ears.

"One…"

Ooga dared one last glance behind them, expecting to see Red picking up the pace. He knew the layout of the island, surely he would be able to guess their plan?

"Two…"

Red wasn't speeding up. In fact, if he didn't know better, he could swear he was…

Smiling?

"Three!" 

They turned the corner, and despite being tensed to dart left, Ooga skidded to a halt. Beside him, Klik gasped, and Klak said a bad word that he hadn't used for months. They were as frozen in place as he was, though he didn't dare look over to confirm it.

At the center of the ice cavern that lay before them, growing directly out of the floor like some sort of grotesque ice statue, a massive monster made entirely out of ice loomed above them. He could make out the shape of a face, somewhere way, way, way up there. It wasn't a happy face.

_This is rounding out to be a really, really bad day._

-:-:-

Natare slowed, staring up at the island. The water currents had changed, and the area was quickly growing colder. Above, a sense of rage and self-assurance radiated from the surface. The threat display of a powerful totem could be felt miles around, if there was anyone there to sense it. That flare of power was unmistakable.

Their mortal had engaged the enemy, and Duratus was on the move.

 **So,** they said, mostly to themself. **It's starting.**

-:-:-

"What in the name of the gods-" Klik began.

"Scatter!" Klak shouted, snapping out of his daze and pushing both of them to either side. It wasn't an aggressive shove, but it was firm enough to get him to stop staring.

Ooga darted left without further hesitation, running parallel to the monster and towards the side of the wall. This wasn't an ordinary cave, he realized - it was huge. It had to cover at least a third of the island. Was this the ice monster room or something? And for that matter, how had this ice monster gotten in there? It was too big to fit in the front entrance, and the little exit he spied at the other end of the cave wasn't going to cut it either.

_Maybe it grew out of the floor. Who knows?_

He wasn't right in front of the thing anymore. Ooga slowed to scan the cavern, keeping himself close to the wall and hoping that he was small enough to avoid being noticed. The others had gone the other way - none of them had run straight at the thing, which he didn't blame them for - and the monster had somehow swivelled to face them. Was that even possible? How did it turn if it was stuck to the ground?

Then again, he wasn't sure if this thing existing was possible in the first place, so whatever. A little more impossibility wasn't really what he should be complaining about.

_Talk about an abominable snowman. I mean, yeesh._

The ice monster bellowed, rearing back and raising its hand. With a swirl of translucent blue light - the same sort of light as Natare was made of, he realized with a start, though this one was tinged ever so slightly more purple - snow materialized in its hand, rapidly accumulating until it was a pretty sizeable ball.

"Oh boy," Ooga muttered, pressing himself flat against the wall.

Snowball fully grown, the ice monster roared and let it fly.

"Klik, watch out!" Klak shouted from somewhere.

Klik dove and rolled, skidding wildly on the ice. That extra slide was all that saved him, giving him a few extra feet as the snowball slammed into the ground behind him with enough force to flatten a pygmy. Ooga winced at the loud noise it made.

 **On your feet, challenger!** roared the ice monster, drawing back to summon another snowball. **If Infernus wants to stake a claim in my territory, it will have to do better than that!**

Oh, hell.

"Not again," Ooga groaned, pressing his hands to his forehead. "Another totem? Are all you bastards just here to make my life difficult?"

Alright, fine. Natare had warned him that there would be a totem on the island. At least now he knew where and what he was supposed to be fighting, which they had helpfully not said a word about.

 _How_ he was supposed to fight this thing was another thing they had completely neglected to mention.

The ice totem had another snowball in hand, and it hurled it full speed - right at Klik again. Klik was ready this time, though, and he dove _forwards_ rather than to the side. That took him easily out of the line of fire, and he even landed in a crouch. Not bad for a nerd.

Undeterred, the ice totem raised an arm to strike again, and Ooga winced at how it didn't so much as glance at him or Klak. Klik was panting, and though he was watching the totem intently for any signs of movement, this sort of dodging just wasn't natural to him. He couldn't keep this up forever.

_Why's it only targeting Klik?_

Ooga glanced quickly back at the entrance - no sign of Red. Was he hanging back and letting the ice monster take care of them, or was he just looking to avoid being flattened himself? Both would make sense, all things considered.

Either way, the totem was the real problem. This wasn't going to last. He needed some way to take the heat off Klik, ironically enough, and he needed it fast.

Ooga pushed himself away from the wall and the safety of cover, planting himself solidly in the totem's line of sight. He wasn't exactly the world's greatest expert at dodging, but it would at least split the work between him and Klik.

"Hey, ugly!" Ooga shouted. "Why don't you chuck snow at the guy who spent the past hour thinking of ice puns? Because I can guarantee that I'm more of a pain in the ass, and you don't want me to prove it!"

Klik shot him a weird look. He wasn't exactly sure what sort of look that was, but he liked to think it was somewhere between alarmed for his safety, exasperated because he was being a piece of shit again, and grateful because he was doing something nice that he deserved to be appreciated for.

He might have been projecting a little, though.

The ice totem snarled, rearing back to throw. Mission 'piss off the giant totem' was a go. Lucky for everyone, no one was as good at being an annoying bastard as he was. Ooga tensed, bending his knees and leaning forward in preparation of the incoming projectile.

It threw the snowball, full speed-

Directly at Klik again.

_Oh, come on!_

Klik was slow on the uptake that time, just barely clearing the danger zone in one large, slippery jump. He wound up flat on his ass, and lay there for a moment, dazed.

"Don't _ignore_ me!" Ooga complained, straightening and giving the totem a dirty look. "Who peed in your breakfast, man? If you're going to try to kill us, at least be less of a dick about it! Equal opportunity destruction!"

Still no reaction. The totem ignored him, rearing back and starting to summon another snowball. Klik was shaking his head to clear it, and in no position to get out of the way.

_Shit. Time to try something else._

**Infernus intrudes on my domain and sends this weakling to challenge me?** demanded the totem. **Is Ardebit trying to insult me? Is this some sort of joke? They might be having a good laugh down in hell, but I don't find this funny!**

"I dunno," Ooga said, cupping his hands over his mouth to be heard. "Does Ardebit have a sense of humour?"

The totem turned its head to stare at him, looking irritated. Or he assumed it looked irritated, at least. It was sort of hard to tell with the whole 'face made out of ice' thing. **Don't patronize me, shrimpling.**

"Hey, I'm just saying," Ooga said, raising his hands in surrender. Finally, a reaction! "Last I checked, Ardebit didn't seem the type to make that sort of joke."

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Klik get to his feet. Was he staring at him? It looked like he was staring at him.

_Come on, Klik, get out of here! I can't stall this hunk of ice forever!_

**You personally met with the head of Infernus?** The totem seemed more puzzled at this than anything else, and it turned to face him completely. That was weird - it looked like the ground was somehow warping beneath it to let it rotate. **But you are such a puny creature. Is that allowed?**

Normally he'd object to being called puny, but given that it was a giant monster of living ice saying it, he'd learn to live with himself for letting it slide.

Klik was moving, hurrying towards the other side of the cavern. Klak was already there. Slowly, trying to make it look natural, Ooga paced back and forth a bit, edging closer to the direction of the exit every time.

"I think it was some sort of regulated thing," Ooga said, shrugging. "You know, the whole 'tribe nearly got killed, now all the totems vote on it' sort of deal. I met a bunch of pretty powerful guys."

 **Ah, a vote,** said the totem. **I see. I was worried that I was attacking the compatriots of someone important.**

"Hey!" Ooga sputtered, waving his hands. "I'm still plenty important! I can talk to you guys, can't I?"

 **That _is_ curious,** the totem allowed. **Totemsight is rather rare among you mortals. And I see the vote was passed in your favour. You must have made a good impression on the council.**

"Yeah, I guess so," Ooga said. "Lucky me."

 **Interesting,** said the ice totem. **Are you a new priest of Oceanus, then? Do you have a patron? You don't seem to be carrying an idol…**

Patron? If Natare counted, sure. "Uh, maybe?"

 **Nobody that would be able to do much if I crushed you, probably,** the totem mused, mostly to themself. **I've got nothing to fear from lesser totems of Oceanus. Even if it's Acutus, the fast bastard. I'd take that pretentious shark in a one-on-one fight any day…**

"Whoa, hey, let's maybe not do that," Ooga said hastily. "I, uh, I didn't see you at the vote. Were you somewhere else?"

 **I rarely attend such events,** said the totem. **The council is a stifling place. If I cannot sit at the head of Animus, then I would rather not sit at all.**

"So what, you ditched?"

 **I am recognized as an independent totem,** said the totem, a bit miffed. **It is not 'ditching'. Besides, I have a mortal partner to worry about. Rather a hassle, honestly, but what can you do?**

"Duratus!" Red shouted, and Ooga whirled to see him storming towards them. He must have noticed the lack of snowballs being thrown and come to see what was going on. "You're supposed to attack intruders, not gossip with them!"

 **Don't tell me what to do,** retorted the ice monster, ice creaking as they shifted. **Sometimes I want to keep up with the times, you know.**

"Yeah, man, come on," Ooga said, crossing his arms. "Lighten up."

Red fixed him with a stony glare, and Ooga backed away, watching him warily. There was no forgetting how he had punched through Booga's ribs in one shot. No way, no how was he getting in range of that.

"You want to divide my family," Red said. "Mark my words, little stranger. You will regret trying to do that."

" _Your_ family?" Ooga sputtered, his fists clenching at his sides. "Who do you think you're kidding here? You kidnapped part of _my_ family and kept him trapped here on some chunk of frozen hellwater-"

"Kidnapped?" Red laughed, a deep baritone that shook the ice a little. He took a step forward, and Ooga took a step back, keeping a close eye on his hands and his posture. One slip up meant game over with this guy. "I think not! Duratus and I will provide him the greatest protection possible."

"The only thing he need protection from is creepy bastards like you!"

"Really?" There was a dangerous gleam in Red's eye. "My, my, you really are out of the loop. Even if you steal him from me, what are you going to do when the others come? What will you do when someone less concerned for his safety tries to take him? The world is moving, little stranger, and the next totem who comes looking might have a worse agenda than ours."

"What do you mean, others?" Ooga demanded. "What do you bastards want with-"

Too late, he saw the tension in Red's posture release, and he leaped backwards just as Red swung a fist - holy gods, that was _fast!_ \- and narrowly missed his chest. It still clipped his arm, sending him spinning and slipping until he finally crashed in a sprawl of limbs.

"Oww," Ooga groaned, pushing himself up. "I wasn't expecting a _warm_ welcome, but this is just-"

He didn't even get to finish his pun, because Red was in front of him before he saw the big man moving. All he got was a quick flash of a raised leg and the bottom of his foot before he threw himself into a desperate roll, muffling a cry of pain as the edges of the icy floor bit into his skin. Behind him, he heard the crunch of ice as Red stomped on the spot he had just been.

_Keep moving, keep moving-_

Geez, dodging sure seemed like the flavour of the day. Not a good sign for him. If he could get his feet back under him, he might be able to do something else, but Red wasn't giving him time to think or catch his breath.

In fact, he probably ought to look up sometime in the next half a second, or-

Ooga braced his arms on the ground, not even bothering to look at Red, and pushed himself up with both hands - legs free, body mobile - before shoving off the ground with both feet, sending himself flying a good few feet backwards. He heard Red's fist hit the ground where he had been before he landed with a rough but nonfatal impact.

_Hah, nice. Bet that looked cool._

Even better, it had bought him time. Ooga scrambled to his feet as Red straightened, a grim smile on his face. Their eyes met for the briefest of instants.

_You're tough, but I bet I can beat you in a footrace._

Ooga grinned, already turning to run, and-

Red rushed at him with the speed of a charging boar, covering the distance between them in about the time it took to blink. One moment he was there, and the next he was way, _way_ too close-

_Oh geez I definitely cannot beat you in a footrace abort abort ABORT-_

**Red, watch out!** Duratus warned.

Red jerked back before he hit Ooga, recoiling sharply, and something shot between them in a blur. A spear, Ooga realized, blinking in astonishment. What in the world was-

"Move it, numbskull!" Klak shouted, and Ooga craned his neck to see him raising another spear - the last one, if his count was right. Klik must have given him his. "We're leaving!"

_Holy shit, I take back everything rude I ever said about you. Except the stuff that was really funny._

Ooga bolted for the exit like the ground was biting at his heels, heart pounding so loud that he could barely hear Duratus roaring. He only glanced back when he reached the makeshift door, and - much to his surprise - saw Klak holding his own pretty well. He was keeping Red at bay with the spear, backing steadily towards the exit himself.

"Come on!" urged a closer voice, and someone grabbed his arm - Klik. "We have to go!"

"Klak?" Ooga asked, too breathless to say anything else.

"He'll be right behind us," Klik said, pulling at his wrist. "We have to hide and regroup, Klak has the best shot of getting away - come _on!"_

Well, no arguments there.

At his nod, Klik dashed off, and Ooga followed a step behind. Hopefully he had a destination in mind, but anything that wasn't back there was fine by him. He'd follow Klik if he suggested jumping in the ocean at this point.

The panic was giving way to sheer adrenaline, and he couldn't help but giggle helplessly as they sprinted away. He was alive, they were _alive,_ and this mission wasn't over yet. He wasn't finished just yet.

_Not today, suckers!_

He wasn't done until he was dead.

-:-:-

The crashing ice and roaring were probably not good news, Newbie decided.

They hadn't dared stop running. Red crashing through that wall had to mean the tribe was closer than they had thought, and probably hot on their trail. Doubtless he had engaged them in some sort of fight to the death that they did _not_ want to stick around to see. The roaring was… harder to explain, but they hoped it meant Red had something up his sleeve.

Granted, they didn't like Red, but they'd take their chances with the guy who wasn't trying to gut them.

_When did all of this turn into such a mess?_

They hadn't stopped running, but their mind was racing even faster. What did this mean? What was going on? What should their next move be?

_Get to Nooby. Get them out._

That was the plan, but after thinking it over, Newbie wasn't sure it was as good a plan as they had thought. The people who Nooby had said would save them were here to kill them. That meant that either Nooby had lied, or Nooby had been wrong.

_I don't think they'd lie to me. If they did, I'm in a lot of trouble._

No, Nooby hadn't given them reason to doubt them like that. Newbie shook their head, trying to clear those thoughts away. They couldn't let their suspicion get the better of them - they only had one ally. Paranoia couldn't be the thing that took it from them.

_So Nooby didn't know…?_

That seemed wrong, too. Didn't Nooby live with those guys? The thought that they wouldn't know about this was definitely strange. But what other option was there?

_There is one more variable. You don't know exactly what killing is, do you?_

That was true. It wasn't anything concrete - the same vague memories as before, images of things and places they had never seen. Wasn't it possible that they had been wrong? Wasn't it possible that they were just imagining it?

_No, not this one. I know death is real. It's too strong to be just my imagination._

They didn't like death. Even just thinking about it sent a wave of revulsion and fear through them, like their very existence recoiled from it. If they were honest, they weren't sure exactly what it meant, but it was definitely bad. 

It wasn't like there wasn't proof. The sharp thing the blue-eyed freak had cut them with had left gashes in their skin, holes that burned and leaked - bled, their memory supplied, that red stuff was blood and it was supposed to stay inside them - and even though their skin had closed up pretty quickly, the scars still hurt as badly as they did when the wounds had been inflicted. Their mortal body had taken damage. And by the sharp, ruthless way their attacker had lashed out, they had been aiming for some much more vital spots on the body. If their strange, automatic reflexes hadn't intervened…

Well. They were very, very lucky they had.

_The worst hurt imaginable, and they're trying to do it to me. They're trying to do it to their own tribemate. Those people can't be trusted._

Of course, that was easier said than explained to Nooby.

Newbie ducked through another opening in the ice, slowing down enough to avoid scraping their limbs on the more narrow passage. This small body was good for this sort of movement. Fragile or not, identical to someone else's or not, the fact that they were alive to _have_ this body was something worth being grateful for.

Probably.

Cautiously, Newbie peeked around the corner, scanning the wider opening for hostiles. Couldn't be too careful with violent strangers on the loose. Unnecessary caution, as it turned out, because there was only one person in the center of the room.

"Just Newbie is back!" Nooby exclaimed, sitting up. 

Nooby was… weird. Annoying, sure, and not very bright - but they had the feeling that there was something more to them than the surface implied. And though they did feel a sort of revulsion at the thought of being a copy, they tried to clamp down on those feelings. Nooby was a victim of Red, same as them. They had to stick together.

They weren't sure they liked Nooby, but they didn't want them dead.

"We need to go," Newbie said, grabbing their arm and pulling them to their feet. "It's not safe here anymore. We need to get somewhere safe."

"Just Newbie and Nooby not going to wait for tribe?"

Newbie hesitated, shifting in place. How were they supposed to explain that the tribe was here to kill them, and that the blue-eyed freak had stabbed them already? "…No. We can't count on them."

Nooby blinked at them, smile fading a little.

"Just trust me, okay?" Newbie glanced behind them nervously. "We don't have a lot of time. I know where to go, but…"

"Just Newbie and Nooby can stop and get fish first?"

Silence.

"That's actually a pretty good idea," Newbie said. "Let's do that. I'll explain on the way."

-:-:-

Once they were safely away and their desperate sprint had ended, Klik had gone quiet. He wouldn't even look at him. They stood frozen (heh) in the shadows of some massive pillars of ice, waiting to catch their breath, and for Klak to catch up if he wasn't dead. Silence was probably a good idea, but this one was… stifling.

Fighting Red and the ice monster was looking more and more tempting. 

As much as he wanted to, Ooga didn't dare break the silence. Klik had seen him talking to that ice totem - he'd seen the way the totem responded, and they'd exchanged words that no one else could understand. He hadn't said anything about it, but the silence was words enough for him to know that this wasn't just going to slide.

_I'm really in for it now._

The uncomfortable silence was broken by a quick, repetitive thumping, and Ooga pressed closer to the wall to listen. Footsteps on ice. They were fast, and getting closer. Not the thunderous ones of a heavy-footed stranger, though, which meant…

Ooga stuck his head out from behind the ice pillar to see Klak, running at full speed. He waved a hand to get his attention, and Klak immediately changed course, skidding into their little hollow of cover.

_Not dead, and if he came over here, he must have lost Red somehow. Pretty impressive._

And even better, now he had someone he could talk to without making everything awkward.

"Hey," Ooga said, flashing a weak grin at him. "Thanks for the save."

Klak grunted, giving him a thumbs up. "You too."

Oh, yeah. He technically had saved everyone's asses by stalling the totem. That was a point in his favour, right? Probably.

"What were you doing back there?" Klak demanded, once he had caught his breath. "You can't just snark at giant ice monsters!"

"That's the kind of attitude that leads to a boring life," Ooga said. Ah, banter. So pure and straightforward. How he had missed it.

"It's the kind of attitude that doesn't get you squashed by some sort of horrific snow golem! Are you _trying_ to get yourself killed here?"

"Way to judge by appearances," Ooga said, raising an eyebrow. "Just because they're a horrific snow golem doesn't mean they don't have feelings."

"What are you - it tried to _kill_ us!" Klak protested.

"Details," Ooga said, waving that off. "You can't just nitpick all these things about people. See, this is why I'm better at making friends than you."

"You didn't make friends with it! You just spent thirty seconds being an annoying dick!"

"You could hear it talking," Klik said. Both of them looked over to see him staring at Ooga, expression unreadable. "You could understand what it was saying?"

"Yyyeah," Ooga said, shifting his weight. There went the friendly atmosphere. "Long story. The short version is that the ice monster's a totem, they're working with Red, and they're going to try to kill us."

"A totem," Klik repeated. "Like the things you met in the volcano?"

"Those would be the ones," Ooga agreed.

"Are you telling me that thing is a god?" Klak demanded.

"Not exactly a god," Ooga said. "Think of it like the supreme overlord of ice cubes."

"Can you be _serious_ for once?"

See? He knew that was dumb.

"Okay, yeah, it's basically a god," Ooga said. "News flash: the gods are dicks."

"How do you know it's a totem?" Klik asked. His voice sounded a little distant. That was… probably not good.

"Uh," Ooga said, shifting uncomfortably. "Yeah. About that…"

"You _do_ know it's a totem, right?" Klik asked.

"Yeah, it is," Ooga said. He hated how hesitant his voice sounded. Damn it, he'd just faced down a giant ice totem, why should he be getting scared now? "I can… hear them, I guess. Their voices are different than ours."

"I just heard roaring," Klak said. "You understood that?"

"No, that was just roaring," Ooga said. 

"And you can talk to them," Klik said, not paying them any mind. "These totems. You can understand them, and they can understand you?"

"Unfortunately for me, yes," Ooga said. "They seem to spend most of their time talking shit about each other. You really aren't missing out on much."

"Sounds like your native language," Klak muttered.

Klik said nothing, his brow furrowed in thought.

"Um," Ooga said, his toes curling anxiously. "Are you, uh, gonna get mad?"

"Is that why you didn't tell me?" Klik asked, though he sounded like he was talking to himself. "You thought I would get mad?"

"Uh, yeah," Ooga said. "That, and I'd have to explain that I was talking to an invisible fish. I've yet to come up with a good way to do that, and believe me, it wasn't like I wasn't trying."

"You were talking to a what?" Klak asked.

"See? No matter how you put it, it sounds dumb."

Klik hesitated, chewing on his lip. "Well…"

"I'm just saying," Ooga said, raising his hands defensively. "Getting mad at me isn't exactly out of character here."

Silence. Klik didn't meet his eyes. Klak shifted uncomfortably, looking like he wanted to be anywhere else in the world but there. 

_Hey, man, I know the feeling._

Finally, Klik sighed. "I don't know what to think, but I do know that Nooby's our first priority. We can deal with this later. And I'll… hear you out."

Oh, thank gods. It took every ounce of self-restraint and dignity he had to not slump over and sigh. That was a hell of a lot of weight off his shoulders.

"For now…" Klik gave him a hesitant half-smile, almost cautious. Trying not to scare him? "We might as well put this ability of yours to use, right? It might come in handy."

"Sounds good to me," Ooga said, trying to sound casual and not really succeeding.

_Holy hell, I just dodged the biggest damn bullet that has ever gotten shot at me._

"Great," Klak said. "Does that mean we can get back on track now?"

Ah, yes, the moment-killer strikes again, brutally murdering that moment. Ooga wasn't even mad, honestly. He could use the commotion to lean against the wall a little in boneless relief. 

_And he has a point. It's time we got down to business._

"If that totem is working with Red, we're in trouble," Klik said, chewing his lip thoughtfully. "Between the two of them, I'm not sure how great our odds are of getting Nooby back. We have to assume that it's the worst case scnario, and Nooby _can't_ die without our help for some reason."

"We have three of us," Klak said. "The way I see it, one of us should stall Red while the others look for Nooby."

"What about the ice totem?" Ooga asked.

"What _about_ the ice totem?" Klak demanded. "We can't beat that thing! Our only shot is just avoiding it until we can get off this hellish chunk of ice!"

"Klak has a point," Klik said, rubbing his chin. "Red is our biggest concern, if only because he's mobile. We're going to need to find Nooby fairly quickly, and figure out what to do about that clone besides..."

"And our tracker's dead," Ooga said. "We're off to a great start."

"This snow holds tracks better than almost any material I've seen," Klik said. "One of us might be able to get a read out of it."

"That's a big 'might'. Especially since Booga almost got thrown off in the first place."

"Let's be realistic about this," Klak said. He was frowning, but it was the concentrated sort of frown, not the 'time to complain' sort that annoyed him so much. "We can't count on tracks. For one thing, Red might show up and force us to abandon the trail, and for another, we don't have that kind of time. We need another way."

"Like what?" Ooga asked.

"We should just head back to the place we heard Red and the clone talking," Klak said. "We know they were both there, and the clone would have gone directly to where they were keeping Nooby. They wouldn't have worried about throwing us off the trail."

"That's not a bad idea," Klik agreed. 

"Red's going to be coming after us, though," Ooga reminded him. "What do we do when he shows up?"

"One of us could lead him away," Klik suggested.

"That could work," Klak said. "If one group heads clockwise and the other retraces our steps, we could-"

The ice exploded.

It was a ways to the left, so they didn't get hit by the worst of the shrapnel, but there was still an awful lot of debris in the air. Covering his face and coughing - a piece of ice must have flown in his mouth and gotten stuck in his throat, because that _hurt_ \- Ooga peeked out from between his fingers.

"You know," Red said, and his heart sank. The big man was coming at them at a fast walk, casually stepping over large pieces of ice where he had punched through the wall. "You really shouldn't stand around discussing your plans this much."

_Shit._

"Run!" Klak shouted, brandishing the last spear at Red. "Don't just stand there and get killed! Find Nooby and get out of here!"

"But-" Klik began.

Red swung at Klak, and Klak leaped back, safely out of range. _"Go!"_ he shouted.

Ooga grabbed Klik by the arm and ran, pulling him at a dead sprint until he stopped stumbling and started running on his own. They dashed away at full speed, and when Ooga glanced back, Klak was sprinting in the opposite direction with Red hot on his heels.

"We can't just keep running," Klik said, a little breathlessly. "He'll corner us."

"Yeah," Ooga said grimly. "And we're running out of people to stay behind heroically to fight that guy. I mean, geez, what kind of tank is that?"

"Maybe we should just regenerate home and regroup…"

"No," Ooga said, shaking his head. "We don't have another boat at home. We have no way of getting back here."

Ooga slowed, and Klik matched his speed, easing into a trot and then a standstill. Panting, Ooga rubbed his forehead, trying to catch his breath. Klik pulled him into the crevice of an ice pillar, glancing both ways before letting himself slump against the wall.

"We can take the boat back," Klik said, his voice strained. "We could go get the others, bring everyone back..."

"Assuming we make it there," Ooga said. "It's on the other side of the island."

Klik nodded. "Maybe Red's boat is closer. Should we look for that?"

"What?"

"He has to have one, right?" Klik shrugged. "He got to our island somehow. We could steal that and take it home, then use it to get back here."

Ooga stared at him.

"What?" Klik asked.

He couldn't help it; he started laughing. "Steal a boat," he wheezed, once he could get the words out. "What, you're condoning theft now? You got pissed when you thought I had stolen your glasses."

"It's an emergency!" Klik protested. "You can steal in emergencies! And I mean, it's not like this guy's been _hospitable-_ "

"And I was like, you regenerate with a new pair on your head!" Ooga laughed harder, shaking his head. "Then you thought for sure I had done it because I wasn't even trying to defend myself, but I really hadn't that time. I just wanted to point out that you were being dumb."

Klik sighed, rolling his eyes, but he was grinning a little, too. "Yeah, well, it doesn't help that you actually did steal my glasses once."

"They don't even do anything! What's the point of wearing them if they don't give you like… super vision or something?"

"They help me focus," Klik said, crossing his arms. "I only put them on when I need to concentrate, so it helps me get into the mindset where - okay, that's not the point! Are we getting the boat or not?"

_Wow, what a nerd._

"One more time," Ooga decided. "We'll try to get Nooby out of here one more time. If that doesn't work, then one of us will probably be dead, and whoever isn't will take the boat home."

"Unless we both die," Klik said.

"Let's not do that, then."

"Let's keep walking," Klik said, glancing behind them. "We're right by the edge of the island. If Red catches up to us, it'll be easy to corner us."

Ooga looked over, and sure enough, the ocean water was only a few feet away. "Yeah. Can't waste this lead. Klak can only buy us so much time."

"Should we head inland?" Klik asked, as they set off at a steady walk.

"We'll see at least one of those boats if we hug the edges."

"Do you think you'll be able to work a strange boat all by yourself?"

Ooga scowled at him. So maybe he wasn't exactly what one would call _good with tools or machinery_ , and working anything more complex than a rock was not in his skill set. That didn't mean he deserved the skeptical look Klik was giving him. Sure, it was a little justified, but that didn't mean it wasn't hurtful and insensitive. Or something.

"Great," Klik said with a sigh. "So let's focus really, really hard on neither of us dying."

" _You_ need to focus on not dying," Ooga corrected. "You don't need me to drive the boat."

"Maybe," Klik said. "But I do need you to stay alive."

Uh. "What?" Ooga asked, raising an eyebrow at him.

"Well, I mean…" Klik flushed, rubbing the back of his neck. "Yeah, obviously. You're the only one who can see totems, remember?"

"Oh. Yeah, that."

"Yeah…"

 **This is very sweet,** said a familiar voice, making him jump. **But perhaps you two should focus on your mission?**

Ooga whipped around to see Natare staring at him from the water. He could swear the stupid fish looked smug. "What the _hell,_ Natare?"

"Are you okay?" Klik asked, alarmed. "What do you see?"

"Oh, nothing important," Ooga grumbled. "Just some jackass invisible fish who completely forgot to mention that we're fighting a _giant freaking ice totem._ "

 **Excuse you, I am _plenty_ important,** Natare retorted.

"Another totem?" Klik guessed. "You… know this one, then?"

"You could say that," Ooga said with a sigh. "Natare, this is Klik. Klik, the thing I'm talking to is Natare. Patron asshole of the fish."

 **Nice to meet you,** Natare said.

"So I really can't see them," Klik murmured, his brow furrowing. "That might make this troublesome. Are they on our side?"

"Yeah, I think so," Ooga said. "Hey, Natare, you seen a boat anywhere around here?"

 **The one you came here on is where you left it,** Natare said.

"What about Red's boat? Where's that one?"

Natare waved their fins slowly. **I do not know. If they have one, it is not in the water right now.**

"Right," Ooga said, glancing at Klik. "Red's boat is somewhere inland. We won't see it on the edges."

"Guess our boat is the only option," Klik said.

 **How goes the fight with Duratus?** Natare asked. **They retracted their field of power, so I can safely approach the island now. I still can't go anywhere inside it, but if you need me, I'll be on the edges.**

"Oh, boy," Ooga said, rubbing his chin. "I dunno, Klik, how's the epic battle against the ice monster going so far?"

"Calling it an epic battle is a bit of a stretch," Klik said. He was handling this one-sided conversation thing pretty well, all things considered. "We're in the middle of fleeing for our lives, so…"

"Yeah, that about sums it up," Ooga said. "We're losing. By which I mean we're going to die if we try playing again."

**What do you mean?**

"We can't beat that thing," Ooga said, shaking his head. "Sorry, buddy, but it's not happening. It's just too big for us to handle."

 **Nonsense,** Natare said. They sounded annoyed. **You are more than capable of it.**

"I'm flattered, but have you seen the size of that guy?"

 **You are really giving up now?** Natare floated closer, staring right at him and blowing a provocative bubble. **You're going to leave this quest, and any chance at saving your friend?**

"I'm not ditching my friend!" Ooga snapped. "I'm just not doing your pointless impossible side quest, you stupid fish! If you want this totem gone so bad, then why don't you handle it yourself?"

 **What do you think I've been trying to do for the past four decades?** Natare demanded. **You think I'm doing this out of luxury? Animus has advantage over Oceanus, and this one has a _mortal_ besides!**

"So what, you think having us on your side will make a difference?"

 **Yes!** Natare slapped the water with their fins, a making a loud, frustrated SMACK. Klik jumped at the sound, and Ooga glanced over sharply. Had he heard that? **Duratus has a mortal. With you to tip the balance, I will as well. Don't you see, little fish? You can overcome our disadvantage and win this for the both of us!**

Ooga hesitated, then sighed. "Natare, buddy, I think I see where you're going wrong. That mortal Duratus has? Red? He's got a sort of mortal version of advantage over us. We can't handle someone who can implode ribs by punching them once."

 **…Ah,** Natare said, their fins slowing. They sounded disappointed. **I see. I was not aware that mortals had to worry about disadvantages as well.**

"Yeah, it kind of sucks," Ooga said. "But in our case, it's not a matter of Realms. Red is just stronger than us."

"Whoever is smarter, or stronger, or better prepared," Klik said softly, almost to himself. "Whoever has the better skill set has the advantage."

 **I understand,** Natare said, backing away a little. **I am… sorry. To have put you in this difficult situation.**

"Yeah," Ooga said. "Me too."

For a moment, neither of them said anything.

 **But-** Natare straightened, shaking off the clinging disappointment and raising their head to look at him again. **But this advantage can be adjusted, surely? If you are given better preparations, or we somehow nullify Duratus' strength?**

"Uh, yeah, I guess so," Ooga said, blinking. "If we could do something like that."

 **The stranger - Red, you called him? - draws his power from Duratus,** Natare said. **Their union is their source of strength, but it is also their weakness. Destroy that, and neither will cause you trouble. You'll be able to rescue your friend without further concern.**

"And how do you suggest we do that?" Ooga asked.

 **…Red will be holding an item of great power,** Natare said reluctantly, turning slightly away so they weren't facing him. **An idol made in the likeness of Duratus. If you take that idol, they will be… greatly disadvantaged.**

"An idol of the ice monster," Ooga said, glancing at Klik. Klik nodded slightly - he was listening. That was good. "What do we do to it? Do we smash it or something?"

 **No!** Natare sounded frantic, and he looked down to see them splashing a little in the water. **No, just… just take it. Keep it away from them.**

"Alright, alright, geez," Ooga said, raising his hands. "Is this a big deal or something?"

 **It is… frowned upon,** Natare admitted. **But it is necessary. We must do some unpleasant things to win this fight, correct?**

"There, now you're thinking like a mortal," Ooga said. 

**Then you will try? We will defeat Duratus together?**

Ooga chewed on his lip, glancing at Klik. "You up for trying to vanquish an ice monster one more time?"

"Well, if we have a plan and an actual chance at doing it," Klik said slowly. "I guess I wouldn't be opposed."

 **I like this one,** Natare said.

"Then yeah, we're in," Ooga said, looking back down at Natare. "Defeat Red and their hulking totem buddy, rescue Nooby, live happily ever after. Sounds like a plan."

Natare blew a happy bubble, wiggling a little in place. **Thank you, little fish. And your Infernus friend as well. I am in your debt.**

"I might take you up on that someday."

 **Engaging Duratus in one-on-one combat would not be a wise move for me,** Natare said. **But I may be able to tip the odds in your favour if the game is already close. I will be watching from the edges of the island, and if you need me, I will be there.**

"Great," Ooga said. "I'll be counting on you."

 **Same to you, little fish,** Natare said. **I wish you luck.**

Ooga gave them a thumbs up, stepping away from the edge.

 **One last thing,** Natare said. **Tell your Infernus friend that despite what he might think, you were not chosen to get this ability.**

"What ability?" Ooga asked, halting. "Being able to see totems?"

Klik shifted, and when he glanced over, he was looking at him intently.

 **Yes,** Natare said. **You weren't selected for some greater destiny or any such thing. Gaining totemsight is often a matter of luck and circumstance. We totems cannot bestow it upon any mortal of our choosing.**

"Uh, alright," Ooga said. "Why?"

 **I believe he needs to hear it,** Natare said.

And with a flick of their tail, they were gone again.

"…Weirdo," Ooga muttered, turning back inland.

"What was that about?" Klik asked.

"I'll fill you in on the way," Ooga said. "For now, I hope you haven't changed your lenient stance on theft, because we've got an idol to steal."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *bursts out of the ground, wheezing* I'M NOT DEAD YET
> 
> Here's a chapter! I hope you like it. I apologize for it taking so long.  
> I hope you signed on for irregular posting schedules because that's what you're going to get.


End file.
